Leaving hubby often is cruelty: Court

Leaving hubby often is cruelty: Court

Monday, Jan 20, 2014, 6:53 IST | Agency: DNA
Grants divorce to man who accused wife of frequently going to her parents' place without his permission.

Representational pic

If a woman leaves her matrimonial home regularly without her husband’s permission or on false pretexts, it amounts to desertion and cruelty to the man as he would be deprived of marital bliss, observed the family court recently while granting divorce to a couple. 

The couple married in 2007 and have a daughter, whose custody has been given to the mother. The man had approached the family court, seeking divorce in his petition. He alleged that right from the beginning, his wife never made any attempt to get herself know her in-laws. 

“Even after 15 days of marriage instead of mixing up and knowing the family members, the respondent preferred to go to her parental house without information/permission of the petitioner. Such conduct of respondent continued thereafter,” stated his petition. 

The husband further alleged, “He tried his level best to continue relations but there was no change in the behaviour of respondent.” After going through the arguments and affidavit filed by the husband, the court issued notice to the woman. Since there was no response from her side, the court passed on an ex-parte order.

The court noted that “The parties are young. They are supposed to spend maximum time with each other. Particularly, after the birth of their daughter. It can be inferred from the evidence that even though the petitioner was not at all fault, the respondent deprived him from marital bliss without any justifiable reason.”

Further it said “Even if there are disputes/ differences between the married couple those can be solved by taking initiative. Miscommunication/ misunderstanding creates distance in the relation. 

Normally the guilty spouse either takes aggressive stand and/or keep silent. The conduct of the parties can be inferred from the pleadings and evidence. It clearly shows that the respondent deserted the petitioner for a long time. The desertion amounts to cruelty.” 

The court granted divorce and directed the man to pay a monthly maintenance of Rs 1,500 to the minor child.

Source - http://www.dnaindia.com/mumbai/report-leaving-hubby-often-is-cruelty-court-1953827

Father moves HC after child ‘tutored’ by mother refuses to speak to him

Father moves HC after child ‘tutored’ by mother refuses to speak to him

Mohan K Korappath, Hindustan Times
Mumbai, December 03, 2012

When a child does not speak to the father due to a strained relationship between the parents, despite staying under the same roof, it is an undesirable state of affairs, the Bombay high court observed.
The court was hearing a petition filed by Prakash Shah (name changed), a senior vice-president of a multi-national bank, seeking access to his 11-year-old daughter. Prakash stays in the same house with his wife, Anjali.

Noting that the mother had refused to allow her child even to speak to the father, justice Roshan Dalvi said: “Children of such strained relationships are tutored and even indoctrinated into refusal and self-denial”.

“This is one stark case of a child being made an unfortunate victim of a bitter family dispute,” the court said.

Deeming it fit to unite the two, the child was called to the judge’s chamber. However, she again refused to speak to her father. In fact, the girl “parrot-like repeated the incidents which the mother herself had stated to the court”.

“Despite the court's initial attempt to help the child see reason in the pristine relationship of a father and child, she only showed vengeance and revenge for the incidents, which are stated to have transpired,” Dalvi said.

The child even refused to answer questions of the court and to hear what the father may want to say, the court observed.

“The child is obviously tutored and advised into refusal,” Dalvi held.

“It appears that she has been instructed to refuse to do whatever the court requested on the premise that it was her desire. The entire exercise is misconceived and ill-advised,” the judge added.

Even though Anjali was opposed to it, the court directed the girl attend sessions with a child counsellor at the family court in the city.

“It would be impossible for the court to go any further in making the child see reason in the face of total and complete denial and disobedience of entreaties of the court,” Dalvi said.

A report has been sought before the next hearing on January 8.

http://www.hindustantimes.com/India-news/Mumbai/Father-moves-HC-after-child-tutored-by-mother-refuses-to-speak-to-him/Article1-967550.aspx

I-T returns not gospel for deciding maintenance to be paid by husband: Bom HC

I-T returns not gospel for deciding maintenance to be paid by husband: Bom HC 

TNN, Nov 29, 2010,

MUMBAI: Tax returns are not sacrosanct when it comes to calculating the maintenance paid by a man to his estranged wife and kids, the Bombay high court has ruled.

In two recent cases, the HC thwarted the attempt of two businessmen who challenged the maintenance awarded to their wives, pointing at their paltry earnings as shown in income-tax returns. However, Justice Roshan Dalvi said, "The consideration of the income contemplated under the (Hindu Marriage Act) does not mean that only the numerical figures shown in the tax returns of a party can be taken as the gospel. The ascertainment of the income has to be done judiciously, and sensibly, not arbitrarily." or only arithmetically." ,'' the judge added.

The court said, the tax returns might be only one side of the story. "It would be absurd to consider the net income of an assessee who has various sources of income some of which may not be taxable," at all,'' the judge said.

In the first case, Dilip Singh, a businessman in the has glass industry and has offices in Goregaon and Kandivli, challenged a family court's order to pay maintenance to his estranged wife. He claimed that according to his IT papers, his income was Rs 16,000 per month but going through his documents, the court could not agree with it. went through his financial documents to find a mismatch. "In this income, the man would not be expected to have the bank account that is shown to court (with large deposits and withdrawals), the car, the share in the joint-family property, that he has purchased, the exports that he has made and the electricity expenses, that he has paid the property taxes that he has incurred or the employees he pays," he supports in several firms,'' said the judge. The court refused to believe that the market value of his share in the family residence was merely Rs 3 lakh.

The second case related to another businessman, Deepesh Mehta, who objected to a family court's order of paying Rs 40,000 per month to his wife and two sons.

He claimed his monthly income, as per his IT returns, was Rs 20,000. "A person who earns that income, if that be his only income, would not be able to invest in shares of listed companies (to the tune of Rs 55 lakh), insurance, PPF accounts, government bonds, flat, shop," said the court, dismissing his application.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/mumbai/I-T-returns-not-gospel-for-deciding-maintenance-to-be-paid-by-husband-HC/articleshow/7012039.cms#ixzz16lHT3PhU

 

FULL TEXT AVAILABLE AT

http://legalmanthandivorce.blogspot.com/2010/11/itr-not-gospel-for-deciding-maintenance.html

Man fighting for harassed husbands fined 1L by Gujarat HC

Man fighting for harassed husbands fined 1L by Gujarat HC

TNN, Nov 26, 2010, 03.32am IST

AHMEDABAD: The Gujarat HC on Thursday slapped a penalty of Rs 1 lakh on Dashrath Devda, president of Akhil Bharatiya Patni Atyachar Virodhi Sangh for protesting against alleged misuse of domestic violence laws. A division bench fined him for filing frivolous PIL and for wasting court's time.

Devda had approached the HC by way of filing a PIL demanding judicial interference in the alleged misuse of protection laws for women. He was demanding a protection in legislation for men, who are according to him henpecked by their wives.

Devda has been claiming that women have abused the laws, which are in favour of them, but certain protection for men is also required against the misuse of the legislation. He filed this PIL, which came up for hearing before a division bench. When Devda began arguments as party-in-person, the court asked him to withdraw his PIL because his demand was to amend the legislation. Refusing to pay any attention to what the court was hinting at, Devda continued to argue how women in this country are worshipped, and no law is required for their protection. However, the chief justice repeatedly asked him to withdraw the PIL.

Ultimately, the court imposed a fine of Rs 1 lakh on Devda and asked him to pay the money to the Self Employed Women's Association — an NGO working for women empowerment. The court has directed Devda to pay the amount of penalty within two months.

Devda and members of his association often stage demonstrations and take out rallies in the city in protest against the domestic violence laws. They also help men in court proceedings, who face charges of domestic violence from their spouses. In this PIL also, Devda tried to assert their views that different pieces of legislation favouring women are misused, and ultimate sufferers are the family members. The association has been protesting against anti-dowry law of Section 498A of IPC, alimony related provisions in Section 125 of CrPC and the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act.

 http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/ahmedabad/Man-fighting-for-harassed-husbands-fined-1L-by-HC/articleshow/6991947.cms#ixzz16KwY9gFj

Is Marriage is Legalised Prostitution with burden of responcibility ? Indian Women find solace in Live-in relationships but with all benefits of Marriage. P7 news channel discussion on SC judgment on Maintenance and alimony for Women in live-in relationships

Is Marriage is Legalised Prostitution with burden of responcibility ? Indian Women find solace in Live-in relationships but with all benefits of Marriage.

 

P7 news channel discussion ( 08 November 2010) on SC judgment on Maintenance and alimony for Women in live-in relationships

 

Part 1/2

 

 

 

Part 2/2

 

Full text of SC judgment under discussion is available here

http://legalmanthandivorce.blogspot.com/2010/10/sc-lays-down-conditions-for-women.html

Truths about marital conflicts

Truths about marital conflicts

Oct 12, 2010

A study at University of Michigan has found that many marriages are probably doomed from the beginning because the partners couldn't get their act together.
While some wanted to resolve the conflict, others ignored it. The study has revealed some insights into some lesser-known truths about marital conflicts:
The husband is more likely to use constructive strategies, trying to confront a problem and resolve it by working through the disagreement, while the wife prefers to yell, or give the silent treatment and make the situation worse.
Over time, the wife is likely to change her behaviour, becoming more constructive in her approach to conflicts, while the husband is more likely to remain unchanged. Since both are willing to work together to resolve the dispute, the marriage has a better chance of succeeding, according to the study.
"You can't just have one person using constructive strategies, trying to find solutions and calmly discussing the problem. You have to have both spouses using that strategy," ABC News quoted Kira Birditt as saying.
29 per cent of the husbands and 21 per cent of the wives claimed they had no conflicts at all during their first year of marriage, which is doubtful since partner must make during the early months of a new marriage, and Birditt believes some spouses may have been less than candid on that question because they were interviewed separately.
"The method changed in the third, seventh and 16th year," she said, and the spouses were interviewed together. "When they are together, it's harder to lie. I can see the wife saying oh no, we did have a conflict, honey."
But perhaps the most surprising find was that greater constructive behaviours among wives predicted greater divorce rates.
"We were totally surprised by that. I'm not sure what's going on there. It might be that wives are more likely to use destructive strategies regularly, so when they use a constructive strategy it might be like the last straw. Maybe they're done with the yelling and screaming, but now they really have a problem," said Birditt.
Birditt, by the way, is in her third year of marriage, and she described herself as "happy." So how does she resolve conflicts in her own marriage?

"I think it depends on the situation," she said. "I guess I use all of them. It just depends on how mad I am."
The study is published in the current issue of the Journal of Marriage and Family .

 http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/Truths-about-marital-conflicts/articleshow/6706762.cms#ixzz128xkTGYz

Court: abuse on spur of moment not valid ground for divorce

Court: abuse on spur of moment not valid ground for divorce

 

Making certain statements or using abusive language on the spur of the moment and expressing certain displeasure about the behaviour of elders by the spouse may not be characterised as cruelty, warranting ground for grant of divorce, the Supreme Court has held.

A Bench of Justice P. Sathasivam and Justice B.S. Chauhan said, “mere trivial irritations, quarrels, normal wear and tear of married life which happens in day-to-day life in all families would not be adequate for grant of divorce on the ground of cruelty. Sustained unjustifiable and reprehensible conduct affecting physical and mental health of the other spouse may lead to mental cruelty.”

Writing the judgment, Justice Sathasivam said: “The married life should be assessed as a whole and a few isolated instances over a certain period will not amount to cruelty. The ill-conduct must be precedent for a fairly lengthy period where the relationship has deteriorated to an extent that because of the acts and behaviour of a spouse, one party finds it extremely difficult to live with the other party no longer may amount to mental cruelty.”

The Bench said, a Hindu marriage solemnised under the Hindu Marriage Act could be dissolved only on any of the grounds specified therein. It said: “Cruelty has not been defined under the Act. It is quite possible that a particular conduct may amount to cruelty in one case but the same conduct necessarily may not amount to cruelty due to change of various factors, in a different set of circumstances. The aggrieved party has to make a specific case that the conduct of which exception is taken amounts to cruelty.”

In the instant case, appellant Gurbux Singh, principal of a college was married to Harminder Kaur, working as librarian in a government institute in November 1997 and a male child was born to them in May 1999. Irked by certain remarks made by his wife against his parents, the appellant moved the trial court seeking divorce on the ground of ‘cruelty.' The trial court rejected the petition and the Punjab and Haryana High Court dismissed his appeal. The present appeal is directed against that order.

The Bench said: “We are satisfied that on the basis of such instances, marriage cannot be dissolved. An isolated friction on some occasion like the festival of Lohri even in the presence of others cannot be a valid ground for dissolving the marriage.”

On the appellant's plea that there was irretrievable breakdown and that the marriage should be dissolved by the Supreme Court invoking its jurisdiction under Article 142 of the Constitution, the Bench said: “Though, on a rare occasion, this court has granted the extraordinary relief de hors to the grounds mentioned in Section 13 of the HM Act in view of the fact that the issue has been referred to a larger Bench about permissibility of such course at present, we are not inclined to accede to the request of the appellant. If there is any change of law or additional ground [irretrievable breakdown of marriage] included in Section 13 by the Act of Parliament, the appellant is free to avail the same at the appropriate time.”

http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/article820303.ece

Panel for changes in dowry law and maintenance law (s125 CrPC)

Panel for changes in dowry law and maintenance law (s125 CrPC)

Bangalore, Sep 27, DHNS:

The State Law Commission has recommended amendment to section 498-A of the Indian Penal Code, which deals with dowry harassment cases.

So far, when a complaint was registered under this section, police could take members of husband’s family, including aged parents, into custody. Noting that this provision might give room for its misuse as well, the commission has recommended amendment to the section.
The commission, headed by Justice V S Malimath, on Monday submitted a total of 12 reports on different sections of the Code of Criminal Procedure to Law minister S Suresh Kumar.
The panel has also recommended amendment to section 125 of the CrPC to ensure that wives get proper alimony in divorce cases. The section should be amended in such a way that the man, in such cases, should declare his assets, so that the wife gets alimony and child support accordingly, the recommendation states.
Malimath said in certain cases of divorce, the wife failed to get proper alimony because the man did not disclose his assets. If the law makes it mandatory for the husband to declare his assets, the wife and children will get their due alimony.
Justice Malimath urged the government to implement the recommendations at the earliest. Kumar said the government would go through the pros and cons, before steps are taken.

http://www.deccanherald.com/content/100242/panel-changes-dowry-law.html

Court asks police to lodge FIR against bride for giving dowry

Court asks police to lodge FIR against bride for giving dowry

Friday, March 19, 2010

New Delhi: A Delhi court has directed the police to register an FIR against a woman and her family members, who alleged dowry harassment by her husband and in-laws, for meeting their demands during the marriage.

Additional Chief Metropolitan Magistrate Sanjay Bansal directed the police to proceed against the woman and her parents under the provisions of the Dowry Prohibition Act.

"In my considered view at this stage, it appears that the accused persons (woman and her parents) are accomplice and the present complaint discloses the offence under Section 3 of the Dowry Prohibition Act 1961. Thus, the SHO concerned is directed to register the FIR and conduct investigation as per law," ACMM Bansal said.

Sameer Saxena and his family members were accused of committing cruelty with his wife by harassing her for dowry.
The wife, in an FIR with Roop Nagar police station, claimed her family members had given huge dowry to Saxena at the time of their marriage.

Saxena's counsel Ganganpreet Singh and Karanbir Singh submitted that in the FIR the woman had herself admitted giving huge dowry, which was an offence under the statute.

They filed an application in the court seeking registration of the FIR against the woman and her family members.
The counsel also referred to a Delhi High Court judgement support their contention, besides a circular issued by the Commissioner of Police, which stated that a woman can be prosecuted if she allegedly gave dowry.
PTI

http://www.zeenews.com/news612668.html

Bride, kin charged with giving dowry – Court orders FIR against woman for harassing husband-Delhi court

Bride, kin charged with giving dowry – Delhi court

19 sep 2010

Beware those who give hefty amounts in dowry even if there was no demand from the groom’s side. In an interesting case recently, a woman and his family were in the dock for giving hefty dowry even when it was not asked for. The woman later levelled charges of torture against her in-laws, despite giving a hefty dowry.

The woman landed in trouble when the court ordered to file a criminal case against her and her family members for giving dowry.
The additional chief metropolitan magistrate (ACMM) Lokesh Kumar Sharma also pulled up a Delhi police official for delaying action after receiving a complaint.

“It is a settled law that if a woman, who is well-educated, marries in a house inspite of dowry demands, she is accomplice to the crime,” the court said.

The ACMM also said that “It appears that the SHO prepares reply without applying his mind. Previously also, he placed on record certain communications which were uncalled and unwarranted.”

The ACMM ordered the Station House Officer (SHO) of Shahdara to register an FIR on a complaint filed by the harassed husband. The couple had got married in 2009 but the husband and wife strained relations soonafter.

The complainant husband alleged that he was given dowry by his in-laws at the time of marriage but he did not complain about the same and accepted the articles of properties of his wife.

http://www.asianage.com/delhi/bride-kin-charged-giving-dowry-534

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also @

CITY | Tuesday, August 31, 2010 | Print | Close


Court orders FIR against woman for harassing husband

Shikha verma | New Delhi

A city court pulled up an official of the Delhi Police for delaying action against a complaint. The court directed the SHO concerned to register an FIR against the woman and her family in a matrimonial dispute and dowry case.

“It appears that the SHO prepares reply without applying his mind. Previously also, he placed on record certain communications which were uncalled and unwarranted," said Additional Chief Metropolitan Magistrate (ACMM) Lokesh Kumar Sharma.

The court ordered the Station House Officer (SHO) of Shahdara to register the FIR on a complaint filed in the court by the harassed husband within 48 hours of the order.

The woman had complaint of being tortured by her in-laws despite giving a hefty dowry. However the woman landed in trouble after the court ordered to file a criminal case against the woman and her family members for giving dowry. The SHO submitted before the court, "Due to delayed reporting of the matter, I was unable to takes cognisance in this case."

Annoyed with the reply of the SHO, ACMM Sharma said, "I fail to understand as to under which provision of law, the SHO has been empowered to take cognisance of the cases. Additional Commissioner of Police (ACP) Shahdara DV Joshi has been called along with the SHO."

In the complaint filed through counsels Gagan Preet Singh and Karan Bir Singh, the husband referred to the allegations made by his wife before the Crime Against Women (CAW) Cell of the Delhi Police that a huge dowry was paid by his wife family without being asked for the same.

The couple got married on December 2, 2009 and as apparent from the complaint, differences between the husband and the wife developed soon after the marriage. The complainant husband alleged that he was given dowry by his in-laws at the time of marriage but he did not complain about the same and accepted the articles of properties of his wife. Whereas, the wife had made similar allegation in her petitions filed in the court for seeking maintenance and prosecution of her husband and his family members under Domestic Violence Act.

"It is a settled law that if a woman, who is well-educated, marries in the same house inspite of dowry demands, she is accomplice to the crime," the court said. In her complaint before the CAW, she had alleged that her mother and brother had spent Rs 10 lakh in the marriage and given handsome dowry articles, gold jewellery and Rs 50,000 cash, the counsels Gagan Preet Singh and Karan Bir Singh submitted before the court.

The court acted on the complaint filed by the man seeking registration of the FIR against his wife and family members as police had refused to act on his plea earlier.

http://www.dailypioneer.com/279782/Court-orders-FIR-against-woman-for-harassing-husband.htmlPRINT 

More DP 3 case on wife and gang news @

http://www.saveindianfamily.org/articles/news/752-case-filed-against-woman-relatives-for-giving-dowry.html

Divorce outstrips marriage – Indian Divorce tourism ???

Divorce outstrips marriage

In its latest report, the International Institute of Statistics has revealed that, the world over, the divorce rate has overtaken the marriage rate. A spokesperson of the institute, herself a divorcee, said: "While marriage has always been in fashion, today it is more so than ever; people want to get married not just once but multiple times in the belief that the more the merrier where matrimony is concerned. Since bigamy is against the law, serial matrimony also involves serial divorce."

The spokesperson added that divorce had become the latest thing in trendy chic, so much so that even unmarried people were seeking divorces, presumably from themselves.

The reason for this seems to be that being a divorcee was seen to confer social status on the person and make that person more attractive to suitors.

"It's like applying for a job," said a spokesperson for DIVA, Divorce International Vocational Association. "When you're a first-time job seeker, it's tough to get one. Prospective employers naturally want to know what experience you've had. And when you confess that you have none, nobody wants to know. However, once you have managed to get that first job, the second, third, fourth and fifth jobs are easy. In fact, you don't have to get them; they'll come and get you, through headhunters."
The spokesperson explained that the situation was similar in the case of matrimony, which could be compared to a live-in job, with no extra overtime. "These days, there are few takers for first-time marriage partners. But once you've got a divorce or two on your CV, the line-up for you goes round the block," said the DIVA representative.

With career divorce catching on, a booming new industry has sprung up comprising not just lawyers and alimony experts but also garment manufacturers who specialise in drip-dry wedding saris and eco-friendly recyclable red safas for bridegrooms. Similarly, caterers are cashing in as well what with divorce parties becoming even more popular than wedding parties. The travel trade has also benefited as people go on separate divorcemoons rather than joint honeymoons.

Indeed, so popular has the big fat Indian divorce become, that the Doyenne of Divorce, Liz Taylor, is planning to come to India to get divorced according to traditional Vedic rites, with Sri Sri Savvy Shankar - the celebrated guru of the Art of Splitting - officiating as pundit.

As no one - including Ms Taylor - could remember if the Hollywood star was at the current time in between marriages or in between divorces, it was thought best to employ what in the movie business is known as a body-double. The use of a double - or a stand-in - would legitimately enable Ms Taylor to divorce herself from herself.

Or, as Sri Sri Savvy Shankar once summed up his Art of Splitting: Ek ticket, doh mazaa.

http://blogs.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/jugglebandhi/entry/divorce-outstrips-marriage

Forum for harassed mothers-in-law: 200 counselled in a week

Forum for harassed mothers-in-law: 200 counselled in a week

Mon Sep 13 2010

Rohit (name changed on request), a resident of Shimla, is a broken man today. The last six months have brewed so much of trouble in his married life that this 31-year-old is still trying to come to terms with the "deception" of his wife. In February this year, when he was away to Panchkula along with his family, including his wife, his house in Shimla caught fire. Police investigations revealed that Rohit's wife was the mastermind behind the inferno and she had taken help of the domestic helps to execute her plan. "Since one of the maids got burnt in the incident, she spilled the beans. My wife had paid them Rs 5,000 and also provided them with petrol to burn the house down," said the `victim' who has been married for four years. The family claims the woman also took away all the money and jewellery that was lying in the house before burning it down. While Rohit has filed a divorce petition in a local court in Shimla, the wife has also given a counter complaint of domestic violence with the police and is now "out on bail".
Rohit and his mother had come all the way from Shimla, after seeking "counselling" over the phone at the local chapter of All India Mothers-in-law Protection Forum, to attend a meeting in Sector 10 on Sunday. "We had read about it in the newspapers and called up. These eights months have been traumatic for us but we want to fight it out now as we have been wronged," said Rohit's mother.
This is not an isolated case coming to the forum. The local chapter, which is only a week old, boasts of about 60 members and also claim to have counselled over 200 harassed mothers-in-law till now. The members had gathered near Stop and Stare, Sector 10, for a weekly meeting.
"A lot of people who sought counselling on the phone came to meet us today. This will be a weekly feature. We want mothers-in-law who are viewed rather infamously as the villain of peace to come up with their tale of woes at the hands of their daughters-in-law," said Manjeet Puri, coordinator of the chapter.
Most of the people who have come to the forum lament the "misuse" of Section 498 A of the IPC, which deals with cruelty against women by husband and his family. These harassed mothers-in-law say most of the conflict pertains to division of wealth and property made by their daughters-in-law; failing to coerce to them leads to slapping of "false" cases of dowry harassment and even domestic violence. "I have a house in Gurgaon where my daughter-in-law is living with my grandson. She wanted that I should transfer the property in her name and when I refused to do so, she filed a case of dowry harassment against us. It has been almost two years that she is staying separately," said one Harminder Kaur.

http://www.indianexpress.com/news/forum-for-harassed-mothersinlaw-200-counselled-in-a-week/680901/2

The Economic Value of Homemaking

The History of Homemaking
A homemaker is a person whose main activity is to care for a family and home. This is traditionally an unpaid occupation.
In an effort to understand the value of a private homemaker’s unpaid labor, experts have attempted to quantify the dollar value of the job. No one has come up with a perfectly accurate way to do so.
Four different methods of assessing the economic value of homemaking are listed below. Each method has serious drawbacks and disadvantages.

NOTE: Women Work! does not promote one method over another; we have simply gathered the following data for your information.

Opportunity Cost
In economics, the opportunity cost is the value of what someone gives up when they choose to do something else. The opportunity cost, or trade-off, of homemaking is the income the homemaker would have earned if she had been in the paid workforce. If a woman could have earned $20,000 per year as a bookkeeper, but instead was a homemaker for 15 years, the opportunity cost of being a homemaker would be $300,000.

Problems:
If a woman had not become a homemaker, she may have achieved a higher level of education, received promotions, or even changed career paths. There is no way to truly know what her income would have been if she had stayed in the workforce. Women’s work in paid employment is frequently undervalued. They often earn less money than men who hold the same or comparable positions. Using these undervalued wages to determine the value of homemaking undervalues homemaking as well.

Replacement Cost
This method evaluates homemaking by determining how much it would cost to replace a homemaker with paid workers. All of the homemaker’s tasks and the amount of time spent on each are listed in the table on page 1 of this tip sheet. The hourly rate to hire an individual to perform each of these tasks is determined, and the cost is added up.
Problems:
This method does not take into account the premiums that would have to be paid to get a professional to do the task for a small portion of time or to be on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

The cost to hire an individual to complete a particular task could vary greatly. For example, when estimating the value of a mother’s care for her children, should you equate a mother’s care to the time and care given by a typical child care worker or a child development specialist? Depending on which you use, the value of homemaking is very different.

Many jobs done by homemakers are undervalued in the paid economy. Most child care workers, cleaning personnel and food service employees receive very low wages, few benefits and little opportunity for growth and advancement within the field. Valuing homemaking in this way reflects the undervaluing of these tasks.

Replacement Cost
This method evaluates homemaking by determining how much it would cost to replace the homemaker by hiring one individual to complete all of her tasks.

Problems:
As noted before, domestic workers are generally undervalued in our economy. When using these depressed wages to place a value on homemaking, we are undervaluing homemaking. For example, the median hourly earning, as listed in the May 2004 National Occupational Employment and Wage Estimates for the Department of Labor, Bureau of Labor Statistics, for the occupation of Home Health Aide is $8.81. Based on this value, a full-time (40 hours/week) worker earns $18,324 per year (52 weeks/year). This value is below poverty level for the average family of four ($18,850 a year).

http://www.womenwork.org/resources/tipsheets/valuehomemaking.htm

Partnership
In this method, it is assumed that a marriage is an equal economic partnership, that there is an equal division of responsibilities and that all the gains of partnership are shared equally by the partners. When a wife takes on the role of a homemaker, it allows her husband to earn income without being overburdened by family and household responsibilities. Using this method, a homemaker is worth half of her husband=s salary.

Problems:
The wife of a man who earns $20,000 does not necessarily have half of the duties of the wife of a man who earns $40,000. In other words, her value is not dependent on her own productivity, only on that of her husband. This method also assumes the homemaker has a partner.

Quick Tips for Financial Stability

• Pay off debt, contribute as much as possible to retirement funds and keep a hefty emergency fund.
• Get insured.
• Make sure you have retirement savings in your own name.
• Consider working at least part-time once your children are school-age.

Tip sheet last updated 11/05

पत्नी को पाने के लिए पति की ससुराल वालों से जंग

पत्नी को पाने के लिए पति की ससुराल वालों से जंग

 

गाजियाबाद। एक शख्स ने आज अपनी पत्नी को पाने की आस नहीं छोड़ी है। उसे लगता है कि उसकी पत्नी जिंदा है और वो एक दिन जरूर वापस आएगी। इसी आस में वो इंसाफ की लड़ाई लड रहा है। ये दर्दभरी कहानी सिटीजन जर्नलिस्ट गौरव सैनी की है।

दरअसल गौरव की पत्नी मोनिका डागर अब इस दुनिया में नहीं है। लेकिन गौरव उसे भूल नहीं पाया है। गौरव की मानें तो मोनिका के परिवार वाले एक साल पहले मोनिका को गौरव के पास से लेकर चले गए और फिर बाद में बताया कि उसकी मौत हो गई। गौरव का कहना है कि मोनिका को उसके परिजनों ने कहीं छुपा कर रखा है।

गौरव ने बताया कि मोनिका बेहद होशियार लड़की थी, वो आईएएस आफिसर बनना चाहती थी। शादी के बाद वो एक बेटी को जन्म देना चाहती थी ताकि अपने परिवार को दिखा सके कि लड़कियां बेकार नहीं होती। गौरव की मानें तो दोनों ने मिलकर कई सपने देखे थे जो पूरे नहीं हो सके।

गौरव और मोनिका दोनों अलग जाति के होने के वाबजूद शादी कर ली। मोनिका के परिवार वाले दूसरी जाति के लड़के से शादी करने के लिए राजी नहीं थे। गौरव की मानें तो उसे धमकियां भी मिली थी। जवाब में गौरव ने मोनिका के परिवार वालों से कहा कि कानून उसके साथ है।

फिर दोनों ने 6 जुलाई 2009 को को आर्य समाज मन्दिर में शादी कर ली। कुछ दिन बाद मोनिका के घरवाले पुलिस लेकर गौरव के घर पहुंचे और गौरव के खिलाफ अपहरण का केस दर्ज करवा दिया।

शादी का प्रमाण पत्र दिखाने के बाद भी वो जबर्दस्ती मोनिका को साथ ले गए और पुलिस ने गौरव को हिरासत में ले लिया। एक महीना डासना जेल में रहने के बाद गौरव रिहा हुआ। फिर उसने दिल्ली हाई कोर्ट में अपील दायर की। जिस पर कोर्ट ने मोनिका को 7 अक्टूबर 2009 को कोर्ट के सामने पेश करने के लिए कहा। जिसके बाद दिल्ली पुलिस मोनिका को लाने के गई तो उस गांव के सरपंच ने पुलिस से कहा कि मोनिका मर चुकी है। लेकिन गौरव नहीं मानता की मोनिका मर चुकी है।

सबूत के तौर पर मोनिका के परिवार वालों ने पेपर पेश किए की उसे एक अस्पताल मे भर्ती किया गया था। लेकिन अस्पताल के रिकार्ड में लिखा है कि मोनिका को कुछ दिन बाद स्वस्थ हालत में डिस्चॉर्ज किया गया। गौरव का कहना है कि अगर मोनिका मर चुकी है तो उसके परिवार वालों के पास सबूत के तौर पर पोस्टमार्टम रिपोर्ट या किसी डॉक्टर का डेथ सर्टीफिकेट पर साइन क्यों नहीं है।

पुलिस ने जब केस रिव्यू किया तो मोनिका के परिवार वालों पर क्रिमिनल कॉनपिरेसी और मर्डर का चार्ज लगाया। लेकिन वो बेल पर छूट गए हैं। जिस जांच अधिकारी ने मेरे ऊपर अपहरण का केस लगाया था उसे सस्पेंड कर दिया गया है। लेकिन गौरव आज भी मोनिका की आस में इंसाफ की लड़ाई लड़ रहा है।

http://khabar.ibnlive.in.com/news/37741/3

Its complicated The twilight area between marriage and divorce

Its complicated The twilight area between marriage and divorce

Many estranged couples choose to separate, but not divorce. Seema Sinha meets some to discover how they negotiate their parallel lives

Breaking all convention, Babita decided to walk out of the Kapoor household along with her two daughters, Karisma and Kareena. Reportedly, Babita could not cope with the larger-than-life figure of Randhir's father and filmmaker Raj Kapoor over his life. Decades later, Randhir Kapoor and Babita continue to remain husband and wife, though leading separate lives. "Randhir Kapoor believes in the sanctity of marriage. He has always said that she is the mother of their daughters," says Madhu Jain, author of Kapoors: The First Family of Indian Cinema.

The love has faded, but the couple is wary of looking for new partners. In another case, Ratna Adarkar (name changed) and her husband of 25 years have decided to live a life of compromise, sans the "hassles" of divorce. These are not the only ones who are choosing to stay in the twilight area between marriage and divorce. According to the experts, breaking up is hard — and expensive!

Long after romance is dead, a separation or "non-divorce" offers a happier alternative. Sometimes, they stay together to avoid the expenses of a new household. Actor Saif Ali Khan reportedly decided to divorce Amrita Singh only after his career zoomed with Dil Chahta Hai. Till then, they lived under the same roof, though they remained emotionally distant, reveals a veteran film journalist.

There are no hard statistics, but some divorce experts say they're seeing more of this phenomenon. Says psychiatrist Rajendra Barve, "This gives them space, minus the commitment, which is like having their cake and eating it, too. They may also want to avoid the 'stigma' of divorce." Remarks psychiatrist Kersi Chawda, "If neither plans to marry again, they may simply want to avoid the expenses and time that goes into legally ending their marriage."

Prominent actress Raakhee Gulzar and her writer- director husband Gulzar are one such couple, who have lived separately for years. Says senior film journalist Dinesh Raheja, "Their daughter Bosky kept them bonded. Gulzar and Raakhee would meet for her sake, attend PTA meetings together." In fact, when Gulzar won an Oscar for his contribution to the film Slumdog Millionaire, Raakhee commented that "her husband" was the best.

One of the most glaring examples in Bollywood is of high-profile star couple Rajesh Khanna and Dimple Kapadia, who also chose the middle path of 'non-divorce'. In the 80s, both the auburn-haired gorgeous Dimple as well as the yesteryear superstar wanted divorce, but when Rajesh Khanna began dodging Dimple's demand for financial security for her young daughters, the actress too refused to sign the divorce papers. "Her daughter Twinkle, in her teens then, strongly felt that her parents shouldn't be living together," says the veteran journalist.

Adds Dinesh, "But over the years, the bitterness between Rajesh and Dimple washed away. I have seen them enjoy a party together and found them very comfortable in each other's company. Dimple campaigned for him during elections and also worked in his film. I guess it has worked out for them living separately rather than coming home to be with each other."

Explains a marriage counsellor, "A couple may not legally divorce for the children's sake, or if there is the issue of division of wealth and inheritance. They may also want to keep up appearances in society."

Relationship experts say the arrangement can allow partners to discreetly date other people while keeping up an illusion of marriage for children and the community at large. And finances, significantly, stay intact. "They are really making pragmatic, businesslike decisions for their marriage," point out experts. Also, with both partners working, not all women care for alimony.

But, it may not always turn out favourable. Married for three years and separated for a year, Anandita, an investment banker, who has a one-year-old daughter, feels embittered and cheated by her philandering husband. "He has not filed for divorce and I don't want to either, because I don't want to remarry. I can't have a stranger in my life. When my daughter grows up, I don't want her to blame me for the separation," says Anandita, who is stuck with responsibilities while her husband has it easy.

Talking about the rights of women in such a situation, women's right lawyer Flavia Agnes, points out that women can claim maintenance and demand their right to stay in the same house. "Often, when men decide to remarry, they pressurise their spouse for divorce. Here, the wife can negotiate for a good settlement, a lump sum amount and shelter in the same house," says Flavia. A marriage counsellor adds that she has witnessed couples staying together despite disagreements to claim benefits of medical and pension plans.

However, can the so-called "non-divorced" ever move on emotionally? The emotional and legal closure of an official divorce may forever elude them. They can also find themselves in a difficult spot when one or both partners begin to seriously date again.
It's also financially risky, point out the experts. A partner who no longer lives with you can still ruin your finances or put you in debt.

On the other hand, if you gain assets, your partner could still legally claim half.

Their status is definitely complicated!

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/Its-complicated/articleshow/6525606.cms#ixzz0zFSXF1Vg

High-earning wives to end in divorce

High-flying career women, who make more money than their husbands and end up becoming the chief breadwinners in their domestic partnerships, are more likely to end up in a divorce, revealed a study.

Researchers admit that the reason is unclear, but it may be that male pride is wounded by not being the biggest earner in the household.

The finding comes from a 25-year study of more than 2,500 marriages, hot on the heels of other research showing that househusbands are prone to affairs.

With almost one third of British women earning more than their men, the results could sow doubt in millions of minds.

For the study, American researchers studied the marriages and income of more than 2,500 women who married for the first time between 1979 and 2002.

They found that those women who consistently made more money than their husbands were up to 38 per cent more likely to divorce than others.

Jay Teachman, of Western Washington University, said there could be several reasons behind the statistic.

For instance, financial independence makes it easier for women to find a way out of an unhappy marriage. Besides, dented egos - of both sexes - may also play a role.

"There may be 'wounded pride' on the part of the male that may lead to tension in the relationship. It may also be the case that some women react negatively to a mate that does not earn as much as themselves," the Daily Mail quoted Teachman as saying.

A sudden increase in hours worked was also linked to marriage break downs, according to the Journal Of Family Issues.
"This may simply be a reflection of a woman beginning to work more in response," said the professor.

For a happy marriage, Professor Teachman recommends a 60:40 split in income, with the husband being the highest earner.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/man-woman/High-earning-wives-to-end-in-divorce/articleshow/6523431.cms#ixzz0z9FHPjw4

Apply your mind: You cannot doubt a mother's bona fides -HC to passport officials

Apply your mind: You cannot doubt a mother's bona fides -HC to passport officials

MUMBAI: A woman estranged from her husband won a battle against passport authorities as well as police officials who had objected to her using a duplicate passport for her five-year-old son. On Tuesday, the Bombay high court not only ruled in the woman's favour but also gave the officials an earful.

Observing that a couple in the midst of a matrimonial dispute is likely to file cross-complaints against each other, a division bench of Justice D K Deshmukh and Justice N D Deshpande held that police officials should apply their minds.

The judges pulled up the Cuffe Parade police, deputy commissioner of police (special branch II) as well as the passport authorities. "You cannot doubt a mother's bona fides. Do you think getting a passport is easy? Why would she take so much trouble if she already has the original passport,'' the judges asked.

The court was hearing a petition filed by 37-year-old Priya Karia (name changed to protect identity), a resident of Cuffe Parade in south Mumbai. Priya moved the high court last month challenging a show cause notice issued by passport authorities in July this year seeking revocation of a duplicate passport issued to her son. Priya, in her petition, claimed that she applied for a duplicate passport for her son after her estranged husband informed her that he had misplaced/lost the boy's original passport.

Priya married Shekhar (name changed) in 2000. The couple had a son in 2005. Priya, in her petition, alleged that she was harassed by her husband and in-laws and was compelled to leave her matrimonial home in June 2009.

Priya claims that Shekhar and his parents didn't allow her to take any valuables and important documents, including her son's passport. She asked Shekhar for the boy's passport as she wanted to go abroad with her mother.

Shekhar filed a complaint with the Cuffe Parade police, saying that their son's original passport was intact and that Priya had sought a duplicate passport on fake grounds. Taking a note of the complaint, DCP-SB II sent an ex-parte report to the passport authorities in June. The passport authorities then issued a show cause notice to Priya.

Representing the passport authorities, advocate Mandar Goswami said the petitioner will be allowed to use the duplicate passport and that the original will be confiscated.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/mumbai/Apply-your-mind-HC-to-passport-officials/articleshow/6515654.cms

U-turn by victim's parents; husband let off in dowry death in New Delhi

This again reinforces the misuse of 304B to fudge data of dowry death and dowry harassment to mislead the legislatures and siphon funds from US handlers in the name of women emancipation and empowerment

A recent judgment by Delhi HC has exposed and the mentality of girls’ parents to implicate husband and all his relatives in the desparate attempt to seek revenge or encash the opportunity to extort monies

the complete judgment is available here

http://legalmanthan498adowrymisuse.blogspot.com/2010/09/del-hc-misuse-of-304-b-dowry-death.html 

U-turn by victim's parents; husband let off in dowry death in New Delhi

Monday, Sep 6, 2010,

A Delhi court has acquitted six members of a family, including the husband of the victim, in a dowry death case, considering the flip-flops of her parents while recording the testimonies during the trial.

"I am astonished to see their (parents of the victim) changed versions. These witnesses have deposed entirely different things in their cross examination by their examination in chief," additional sessions judge SC Rajan of a fast track court said.

The court absolved Sandeep Chopra, the husband of deceased Shefali, and his five family members of the charges under section 304B (dowry death), 498A (subjecting a woman to cruelty) and 406 (criminal breach of trust) of the IPC.

Shefali, who married Sandeep in 2006, was found hanging with the ceiling at her matrimonial house at Chitranjan Park area in New Delhi on February 9, 2007.

In the FIR, Anita Bhatia, mother of the victim, had alleged that Shefali's husband used to harass her as one of his friends was not invited to their wedding. They had also demanded dowry, she had alleged.

She also charged the accused first killed her and then hanged her to the ceiling to establish that she committed suicide.

During the trial, Anita and Kuldeep Bhatia, parents of the victim, first testified that she was subjected to cruelty by the accused.

However, when cross-examined by defence lawyers, they took a complete U-turden and denied their own allegations.

The court, while perusing their testimonies, was of the opinion that there was some substance in the allegations but later found out that they were refuted by the witnesses themselves.

http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report_u-turn-by-victim-s-parents-husband-let-off-in-dowry-death-in-new-delhi_1434335

Full text @

http://legalmanthan498adowrymisuse.blogspot.com/2010/09/cross-examination-shatters-498a-304b.html

Delhi govt relaxes marriage registration norms -To protect couples, Delhi govt will amend marriage rules

Delhi govt relaxes marriage registration norms

The love birds have reason to cheer as the Delhi government has relaxed the

Marriage Registration norms in the capital.

In the wake of rising numbers of honour killings in the NCR, the Delhi government has decided to amend the Hindu Marriage Registration rules.

As per the new norms, the Delhi government has decided to abolish the mandatory clause of 1956 Hindu Marriage act, in which it was mandatory for a couple to prove that either of them, or any of their in-laws, had lived in Delhi for at least 30 days for the marriage to be registered in the Capital.

In the new norms, a couple who is planning to marriage are already married can register it within minutes without any residence proof.

The new proposal was moved by Principal Secretary (Revenue) DM Sapolia on Monday.

The move was taken after alarming number of honour killing cases and Khap Panchayat’s dictate came to light.

The new clause also offers police protection to the young couple in case of any threat perception either from family members or any other religious diktat.

The new Marriage registration rules will help couple facing Khap Panchayat threat can get register in Delhi.

 http://english.samaylive.com/nation/676472793.html

……….

NEW DELHI: In the backdrop of reports of honour killings and khap panchayats taking on couples who marry within the same gotra, the Delhi government is gearing up to amend the marriage registration rules in the capital. It seeks to abolish a rule under which marriage registration can be done in Delhi only if the couple can produce proof that either one of them or parents of at least one of them have been residents of area falling under the jurisdiction of the registrar for more than 30 days.
The proposal seeking an amendment in the Delhi Hindu Marriage Registration Rules 1956 is likely to be tabled before the cabinet on Monday. If the amendment comes through, couples from other states who tie the knot in the capital will be able to get their marriage registered here itself.
There has been a rise in the number of cases in which families turn hostile to such newlyweds and several incidents of honour killings have also come to light in the recent past. Haryana's khap panchayats have been in news for the alleged atrocities inflicted on couples who dared to marry within their gotra or outside their caste against their families' wishes.
In its present form, Delhi Hindu Marriage Registration Rules makes it mandatory to have a residence proof of Delhi to register a marriage. It states that one of the parties or his/her parents should have been residing within the jurisdiction of the registrar for more than 30 days for the marriage to be registered in the city.
The revenue department of the state government has sought these conditions to be abolished so that couples who marry in the capital are able to register their marriage here even if they or their parents are not Delhi residents. The only precondition being that the marriage should have taken place in the city.
Delhi high court had earlier reportedly struck down as "unconstitutional'' the rule that registration of marriages could be effected in Delhi only if at least one of the parties or parents of either of them has been a resident of the capital. The court order came in a case where a couple was denied registration due to this clause.
Meanwhile, activists from NGOs such as Shakti Vahini, who have been studying the role of khap panchayats and the reasons behind honour killings, agree that the amendment will make it easier for couples facing resistance from families to register their marriages in the city. However, they are quick to point that this would be a small step and it alone cannot deal with the complexities that are leading to honour killings or atrocities by khaps.
Similarly, Anju Dubey Pandey from Centre for Social Research said such an amendment would certainly make life easier for couples seeking registration in the city. "But since matrimonial issues are complex, those concerned should carefully study the clauses and other issues involved before taking a decision,'' Pandey added.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/delhi/To-protect-couples-Delhi-govt-will-amend-marriage-rules/articleshow/6493705.cms#ixzz0yfAyryA0

'Domestic violence law gives no right to seek maintenance'

'Domestic violence law gives no right to seek maintenance'

2010-08-31 20:10:00

The Delhi High Court Tuesday held that the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005 does not give a woman any additional right to claim maintenance from husband.

Justice Shiv Narayan Dhingra, while dismissing the petition of Rachna Kathuria, said the act only puts on fast track the enforcement of existing right of maintenance available to an aggrieved person.

'If a woman living separate from her husband had already filed a suit claiming maintenance and after adjudication maintenance has been determined by a competent court either in civil suit or by the court of metropolitan magistrate in an application under section 125 of Criminal Procedure Code (CrPC), she does not have a right to claim additional maintenance under the act,' said Justice Dhingra.

Under the act, the court of metropolitan magistrate (MM) has the power to grant maintenance and monetary relief on an interim basis in a fast track manner only in those cases where a woman has not exercised her right of claiming maintenance either under civil court or under section 125 of CrPC.

'If the woman has already moved court and her right to maintenance has been adjudicated by a competent civil court or by a competent court of MM under section 125 CrPC, for any enhancement of maintenance already granted, she will have to move the same court and she cannot approach the MM court under the act by way of an application of interim or final nature to grant additional maintenance,' the court said.

The petitioner had filed an application under the act seeking maintenance.

An MM dismissed the application after finding that a civil suit is already going in a different court and she was getting a total maintenance of Rs.4,000 per month from her husband.

The court also noted that Rachna was living away from her husband Ramesh since January 1996. She also filed a civil suit under Hindu Adoption and Maintenance Act and an application under section 125 CrPC.

Justice Dhingra in his observation said that in case the petitioner felt that maintenance awarded to her was not sufficient, the proper course for her was to approach the concerned court for modification of the order in which she had filed civil suit and which has granted her maintenance.

 

http://sify.com/news/domestic-violence-law-gives-no-right-to-seek-maintenance-news-national-ki5ukdiaghb.html