Misuse and abuse of 498a ipc exposed again | Delhi court says Dowry law cannot be harassment tool and orders investigation against woman for falsely implicating husband

Misuse and abuse of 498a ipc exposed again | Delhi court says Dowry law cannot be harassment tool and orders investigation against woman for falsely implicating husband

Submitted by IANS on 23 March 2014 

New Delhi: A court here has observed that dowry prohibition law cannot be allowed to become a tool for harassment.

Granting relief to a man, who was booked in a dowry harassment case by his wife, the court ordered investigation against the complainant for filing a false case.

The man's wife in July 2012 filed a first information report (FIR) against him in a South Delhi police station, alleging that he demanded dowry and subjected her to cruelty, which resulted in her miscarriage.

Police investigated the complaint and filed a cancellation report, giving a clean chit to the accused.

Metropolitan Magistrate Shivani Chauhan, accepting the cancellation report of Delhi Police, said Sections 498A (subjecting woman to cruelty) and 406 (criminal breach of trust) and Dowry Prohibition Act are special legislations enacted for the "protection of women" and have serious penal consequence for the offender.

"Under no circumstances can it be permitted to become a tool for harassment of innocent persons," the magistrate said.

"There is a enough material on record to show that the complaint was false and fabricated."

During the investigation it was revealed that it was the woman's second marriage and there was no evidence of dissolution of the first.

The woman alleged cruelty by the man which had resulted in her miscarriage. But the court noted that the investigation report showed she had voluntarily got the medical termination of her pregnancy.

It was observed the woman had mentioned the name of the other man in the medical report. The bills of hospital were cleared by the other man.

Source - http://twocircles.net/2014mar23/dowry_law_cannot_be_harassment_tool_says_court.html

Indore-based NGO all set to promote Ilyasi's movie

 Indore-based NGO all set to promote Ilyasi's movie

Venugopal Pillai, TNN | Mar 6, 2012, 03.18AM IST

INDORE: This may come as a solace for those who have been victims of spousal abuse--men in this case.
Forum Against Misuse of Section 498 (A), (FAMUS 498 (A)) an Indore-based NGO, will take up the pre-launch promotion of a movie, 498(A) - The Wedding Gift, based on the lives of men who have been falsely implicated by their wives under The Dowry Prohibition Act. The movie is produced by the controversial presenter of the one-time popular TV show -- India's Most Wanted - Suhaib Ilyasi.
"We are holding the pre-launch promotional activity of the film in Indore, Gwalior, Jabalpur and Bhopal from March 12," NGO convener Ashok Dashora, said. A cycle rally will also be taken out in the four cities. He said T shirts and Anna topis with FAMUS 498 (A) imprinted on them will be distributed to more than 250 volunteers.
Around 1,200 members are enrolled with the NGO since it came into existence in July last year. "People across the state, Maharashtra and even NRIs are enrolled with us. We intend to reach out to as many people as possible in coming days," Dashora said. All members of the NGO have directly or indirectly suffered due to the misuse of the Act, he said.
Apart from helping innocent people, who become victims of Act's misuse, the NGO has also been counselling couples to help them resolve issues out of court. "We have been successful so far in helping 12 couple call a truce and reunite," Dashora said. Prominent personalities, including former high court judges and MP Sumitra Mahajan, have extended their support to the organization, he added.
Talking to TOI over phone from Mumbai, Ilyasi said the movie is inspired by the NGO and some real-life cases that need to highlighted to show the repercussions of falsely implicating people under the punitive Act. "The movie, made with a budget of Rs 5 crore, would be released in April," he said.
Ilyasi himself was booked under Section 498 (B) of the Act. He is an active member of FAMUS 498 (A) and has been participating in the meetings of the NGO.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/indore/Indore-based-NGO-all-set-to-promote-Ilyasis-movie/articleshow/12154705.cms

Divorce could be in women's genes

Divorce could be in women's genes

Press Trust Of India
London, February 26, 2012

Women, please note -- men may not be always at fault in a divorce. The chances of a successful marriage also depends on a female's genetic make-up, so says a new study.
 

 This is after researchers at Karolinska Institute in Sweden claim to have, for the first time, identified afemale 'divorce gene' that can predict a rocky marriage and identify women who may struggle to commit to their partner. 

Women who inherit the variation of a common gene are less likely to get married in the first place as they find it harder to bond with other people, the Daily Mail reported.

But if they do marry, they are 50% more likely to report a troubled relationship filled with marital strife. Perhaps unsurprisingly, partners of women with the gene are also more likely to report being unhappy, says the study.

According to the researchers, the gene affects how women process the 'cuddle hormone' oxytocin, which is known to promote feelings of love and maternal affection.

Women produce oxytocin naturally, particularly during childbirth and while breastfeeding. It helps them bond with their baby. But if women cannot process oxytocin properly, they may not be able to bond normally with other people -- including their partners, friends and children, they say.

'We've found evidence that oxytocin can be involved in the regulation of human pair-bonding by showing that variation in the oxytocin receptor gene is linked to how strongly women bond to a partner," lead researcher Hasse Walum said.

In fact, the researchers have based their findings on an analysis of the DNA of more than 1,800 women and their partners. Each couple had been together for more than five years, and were either married or living together.

Women who were identified as carrying the variation of the oxytocin receptor gene, described as the A-allele, were 50% more likely to report 'marital crisis or threat of divorce. Men married to these women were also far less satisfied in their relationships, the study found.

http://www.hindustantimes.com/world-news/Europe/Divorce-could-be-in-women-s-genes/Article1-817342.aspx 

Massive Procession Cum Dharna by NFHS on 4th June to protest heavy misuse of DV Act

MASSIVE PROCESSION CONCLUDED BY DHARNA

ON 04-06-2011 – BANGALORE

PROCESSION CONCLUDED BY DHARNA on 04-06-2011 by National Family Harmony Society® to protest against heavy misuse of Domestic Violence Act.

About National Family Harmony Society®: “National Family Harmony Society®” NFHS is a Non Governmental Organization (NGO) promoting the cause of “family harmony” and “gender equality”. It is registered under “The Karnataka Societies Registration Act, 1960” and is based in Bangalore. We have branches in more than 16 states and in abroad too. We have approximately 16000 members all over India. To know more about us please visit www.family-harmony.org / www.498a.org.in / http://498amisuse.wordpress.com

 

Details of the Event

Procession starting at Town Hall @9.30 AM

Procession concluding at Banappa Park @10.15 AM

Dharna at Banappa Park 10.15 AM – 12.00 Noon

We request all members who participate in the procession to maintain discipline.

Kindly reach the start point of the procession on time so that there is good strength for procession.

The procession is a “silent protest” and there will be no slogan shouting.

However at the Dharna we are free to shout slogans.

To protest against the injustice by the Government we plan to tie black ribbon around mouth to symbolic show that MEN facing injustice are not even being allowed to speak out.

The Theme of the protest is Gandhi Ji’s 3 Monkeys!!

Judiciary – They are turning a blind eye to the injustice, saying they are law implementers and not law makers.

Legislature- Fearing from women vote bank, Legislature is not speaking out even though they know that Gender biased law’s are heavily misused.

Executive- The executive turn away MEN and do not listen to MEN saying “Do not involve us in this and solve your problem in the court”

So, the question is where do MEN GO???

If the 3 main pillars of the democracy have shut their doors on the MEN then we have hope only from the fourth pillar of the democracy i.e. Media.

We appeal all our media friends to help us to spread awareness regarding heavy misuse of the gender biased laws and injustice caused to MEN and his families due to this.

Please save the family and thereby save our great Nation to retain India a “Vasudeva Kutumbaham”.

Jai Hind!!

With profound respects,

For further information please contact.

Suresh P                                                                                              Mahesh M

President,                                                                                            General Secretary

9880141531                                                                                                 9731569970

---

Marital stress drives more men to suicide than women-Demand Men's Welfare Ministry and National Commision for Men- nternational Men’s day 2010

Marital stress drives more men to suicide than women-Demand Men's Welfare Ministry and National Commision for Men on International Men’s day 2010

Rebecca Samervel TNN

Mumbai

Has the equation in the war of the sexes changed

Strange it may sound,but the National Crime Record Bureau (NCRB) figures released by a city-based mens rights advocacy group shows that the number of married men ending their lives is far more than their female counterparts.And the group claims that the men to women suicide ratio of 65:35 indicates that it is the men can now don the tag of the oppressed sex.

The data was revealed on the World Mens Day by the Indian Family Foundation,a global movement started by the families of Indian men facing abuse in the hands of their wives.According to the figures mentioned in the report in 2008,57,639 married men across the country killed themselves,compared to 30,224 married women.Every nine minutes,an Indian husband commits suicide.Men contribute to 92 % taxes but face 100% ignorance, an organization member said.

The organization pointed out that most of the men who ended their lives were often ridiculed as being weak and irresponsible and denied any support or counselling.No one believes that men can be victims of domestic violence.But a survey shows that in the past 12 years,1,70,000 married men have committed suicide,as they could no longer bear the domestic strife, Zaveri added.

The organization blames the phenomenon on the fact that the world has turned a deaf ear to all the complaints coming from men.There is no limit to the expectations from a man.The unaddressed domestic abuse and family disputes are taking a huge toll on married men.No one shares their pain and there is no social support system for these distressed men, an organization member said.In spite of the suicide of the doctor from Lucknow who left behind a suicide note accusing his wife and in-laws of cruelty,no action has been taken by the police.

The group is now urging the government to start a ministry for men and also a National Commission for Men on the lines of the ones that exist for women.If there can be a government organization for women,children and even animals,we deserve to have one as well, Zaveri said.

http://lite.epaper.timesofindia.com/mobile.aspx?article=yes&pageid=14&edlabel=TOIM&mydateHid=20-11-2010&pubname=&edname=&articleid=Ar01401&format=&publabel=TOI

Woman booked for murder after husband dies of injuries in Mumbai

Woman booked for murder after husband dies of injuries in Mumbai

The Vakola police have registered a case of murder against a housewife on Sunday.

The 31-year-old woman, Jyoti, allegedly set her husband, Rajendra Jaiswal, on fire in September after she learnt that he had been involved in an extra-marital affair.

Initially, police booked Jyoti for attempt to murder. She, on the other hand, had registered a case of dowry harassment against Rajendra. However, after her husband died due to his burn injuries on Sunday, police have registered a murder case against her.

According to the police, the incident occurred at the Jaiswals' residence on September 29 afternoon. The couple initially had an argument over household issues that later turned into a heated exchange of words and then a scuffle. Following this Jyoti brought a bottle filled with kerosene, poured the liquid over Jaiswal and set him ablaze.

"Jyoti also sustained thirty per cent burns and had earlier told the police in her statement that Jaiswal had burnt himself and she got burnt while trying to save him. She also claimed that Jaiswal had been harassing her and demanding dowry ever since they got married in 2004," said an officer fromVakola police station.
Rajendra had sustained 55% burns and was admitted in a hospital at Santa Cruz (East). Jyoti was admitted at VN Desai Hospital for treatment.

"Initially, we filed cross complaints following the duo's statements. But after Rajendra's death, we have registered a case of murder against Jyoti but have not arrested her till now. We will investigate the case and then take action. The body has been sent to Cooper Hospital for post mortem," said senior police inspector Anil Kharade.

http://www.dnaindia.com/mumbai/report_woman-booked-for-murder-after-husband-dies-of-injuries-in-mumbai_1466796

LOK SABHA TV-Gender discourse-MEN NEED PROTECTION , DEMAND MENS’ WELFARE MINISTRY and GENDER NEUTRAL MATRIMONIAL LAWS

LOK SABHA TV-Gender discourse episode on 28 oct 2010

MEN NEED PROTECTION , DEMAND MENS’ WELFARE MINISTRY and  GENDER NEUTRAL MATRIMONIAL LAWS

 

Part 1/4

 

 

 

Part 2/4

 

 

 

Part 3/4

 

 

 

part 4/4

 

Live-In Relationship-Perspective of Indian Women- Misuse of ANTI-MALE Marital laws 498a Dowry laws-Men Husband need Protection-P7 news KAYDA KANOON 26sep10

Live-In Relationship-Perspective of Indian Women- Misuse of ANTI-MALE Marital laws 498a Dowry laws-Men Husband need Protection-P7 news KAYDA KANOON 26sep10

PART 1/2






PART 2/2

Sexual abuse and power display – Sexual Harassment at Workplace Bill be made GENDER NEUTRAL- DEMANDING NATIONAL COMMISSION FOR MEN

Sexual abuse and power display – Sexual Harassment at Workplace Bill be made GENDER NEUTRAL- DEMANDING NATIONAL COMMISSION FOR MEN

You can speak about the condition of a nation by knowing the status of its womenfolk," Jawaharlal Nehru said this decades ago and fashion designer Ritu Beri quoted him at the launch of the serial "Kali – Ek Agnipariksha."

She added, "This way we (India) have a long way to go." The serial deals with the sexual harassment of women, an issue which can alone bring known faces – Renuka Chowdhury, Indira Jaisingh, Madhu Trehan, Ritu Beri, Dilip Cherian, Ranjan Kumari, Sundari Subramanyam Pujari, CA Sundaram – to one platform.

The jury debated the need to understand the reasons for cases of sexual harassment and the immediate need to put an end to it. While Madhu Trehan appealed for a change in the stereotypical upbringing of girls and boys in India,

Renuka's comment "Not all men are bad," served as a breather. On a serious note, Madhu said, "We have a National Commission for Women but there should also be a National Commission for men and parents to address the root cause for such a social evil. Parents should be taught to not adhere to the conventional idea – "Son, you are special!". it is important for men to learn to respect women."

According to Madhu, education alone can bring this much-needed change, "When I had gone to watch " Bandit Queen" there was a scene in which Phoolan is gangraped. I was shocked but a group of people seated in the front row, which is usually not that expensive, cheered. And later when Phoolan kills her molestors, I heard people seated behind cheering her for her courage. It has nothing to do with money but education." But CA Sundaram wasn't much convinced. He said, "About 20 years back there were neither many educated people nor several harassment cases.

However, two decades down the line, there has been a spurt in the number of educated people and harassment cases." While everybody was trying to find out the rea son and ways to fight the social evil, Ashutosh Rana said, "Sexual harassment has nothing to do with gender bias. It is about display of power. When a man acquires muscle, money and education power, he thinks he owns what he likes. That is when physical assault is interpreted as glory! It's like 'Mujhe car achchi lagi and I should have it in my backyard, mujhe bangla achcha laga and it should be mine. similarly koi ladki achchi lagi toh mere paas honi chahiye," he said.

On being asked if stereotypical notions also exist in the fashion industry, Ritu said, "As someone who has been in the industry, I must say there are no gender biases. In fact we have men complaining of being harassed. All I can say is that it is all about education. It's a social disease. I think, all naughty boys should have daughters so that they know what is it all about."

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/tv-/Sexual-abuse-and-power-display/articleshow/6530283.cms#ixzz0z9K4ZNdf

GENDER EQUALITY IN INDIA-INDIAN JUDICIARY – AN OVERVIEW

Domestic violence- More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals

More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals

Campaign group Parity claims assaults by wives and girlfriends are often ignored by police and media

About two in five of all victims of domestic violence are men, contradicting the widespread impression that it is almost always women who are left battered and bruised, a new report claims.

Men assaulted by their partners are often ignored by police, see their attacker go free and have far fewer refuges to flee to than women, says a study by the men's rights campaign group Parity.

The charity's analysis of statistics on domestic violence shows the number of men attacked by wives or girlfriends is much higher than thought. Its report, Domestic Violence: The Male Perspective, states: "Domestic violence is often seen as a female victim/male perpetrator problem, but the evidence demonstrates that this is a false picture."

Data from Home Office statistical bulletins and the British Crime Survey show that men made up about 40% of domestic violence victims each year between 2004-05 and 2008-09, the last year for which figures are available. In 2006-07 men made up 43.4% of all those who had suffered partner abuse in the previous year, which rose to 45.5% in 2007-08 but fell to 37.7% in 2008-09.

Similar or slightly larger numbers of men were subjected to severe force in an incident with their partner, according to the same documents. The figure stood at 48.6% in 2006-07, 48.3% the next year and 37.5% in 2008-09, Home Office statistics show.

The 2008-09 bulletin states: "More than one in four women (28%) and around one in six men (16%) had experienced domestic abuse since the age of 16. These figures are equivalent to an estimated 4.5 million female victims of domestic abuse and 2.6 million male victims."

In addition, "6% of women and 4% of men reported having experienced domestic abuse in the past year, equivalent to an estimated one million female victims of domestic abuse and 600,000 male victims".

Campaigners claim that men are often treated as "second-class victims" and that many police forces and councils do not take them seriously. "Male victims are almost invisible to the authorities such as the police, who rarely can be prevailed upon to take the man's side," said John Mays of Parity. "Their plight is largely overlooked by the media, in official reports and in government policy, for example in the provision of refuge places – 7,500 for females in England and Wales but only 60 for men."

The official figures underestimate the true number of male victims, Mays said. "Culturally it's difficult for men to bring these incidents to the attention of the authorities. Men are reluctant to say that they've been abused by women, because it's seen as unmanly and weak."

The number of women prosecuted for domestic violence rose from 1,575 in 2004-05 to 4,266 in 2008-09. "Both men and women can be victims and we know that men feel under immense pressure to keep up the pretence that everything is OK," said Alex Neil, the housing and communities minister in the Scottish parliament. "Domestic abuse against a man is just as abhorrent as when a woman is the victim."

'Male victims are almost invisible to the authorities,' says John Mays of Parity. Photograph: Guardian

Mark Brooks of the Mankind Initiative, a helpline for victims, said: "It's a scandal that in 2010 all domestic violence victims are still not being treated equally. We reject the gendered analysis that so many in the domestic violence establishment still pursue, that the primary focus should be female victims. Each victim should be seen as an individual and helped accordingly."

CASE STUDY

Ian McNicholl, 47, has painful memories to remind him of the terror he endured when he found himself a male victim of domestic violence.

His then fiancee, Michelle Williamson, punched him in the face several times, stubbed out cigarettes on his body, lashed him with a vacuum cleaner tube, hit him with a metal bar and a hammer and even poured boiling water on to his lap. That at 6ft he was almost a foot taller than her made no difference. He still has burn marks on his left shoulder from when she used steam from an iron on him. Williamson, 35, is now serving a seven-year jail sentence for causing both actual and grievous bodily harm.

During the trial last year McNicholl told the court that, during more than a year of attacks and intimidation, he had lost his job, home and self-respect. He had been too scared to go to the police and had considered suicide. She was only arrested after two neighbours saw her punch him.

Sentencing her at Grimsby crown court last year, judge John Reddihough told Williamson: "Over the period of time you were with him you destroyed him mentally and seriously harmed him physically, leaving him with both physical and mental scars."

 

 

 

 

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence

Practical and Sincere advice to never married men (boys)

Much discussion has already done by our seniors already over here, i want to add something in real about this matter with few more details.
The following are words put here after my marriage experience. It is my view only, not a rule put by our community or rule of law that is to be followed. It is purely personal, which I justify by giving instances at times leading to a big story.
Have time go through it. I have prepared for never married men taking into consideration especially like you. I am thankful to forum that I am able to put through this means.
One of my friends told and I have read it in many places that a man can be understood clearly to 99% of accuracy but a woman can never be understood even to 49% of what is store in her mind.
I have used video recording in most of the contexts, we can get these cameras at an economical cost in market today. Audio recorders or mobile phones can be used. After recording copy them in local hard disks, CD's, DVD's as soon possible. Don't every try to modify the original recordings, Keep it at a safe place. There is some place for these evidences in court proceedings (If the records are not applicable before court at least they will be applicable before people's court, so keep a record of all things possible.). Give complaints to local police station whether you get them or not, when your mobile is lost, clearly stating the date, time, mobile model and the capacity of memory card.
Scan each and every document and store in a safe place globally along with the electronic records accessible through internet. There are plenty of sites offering these services, only thing is you need to login before some specified days, otherwise there is a danger of losing all files. If you have any trouble knowing these you may let me know. Documental evidences are always applicable in court.
You should be cautious with three W's - Wine, woman and Wife according to an English proverb. These are three most dangerous things in any one's life. First two you know, last you might not be. I explain here, wife is also a most dangerous person when she is against you. When all well she is heart and love for you, you will say everything what is store in it which you might have never said even to a close friend or your parents who are whole and sole in your life even when you are at good and bad times in every way possible to them. So she knows even the password of your personal PC, laptop, official passwords, official people, and what not, each and every aspect of you personal and impersonal, family related matters, strength and weakness of each and every member of your family, your resources of income, your income and the story goes like this. You might take a cue from all this that how much personal it is with a wife. She also have access to every relation by phone and email and what ever way, even personally she has been with us through our family or when we make visit to friends and relatives. So she has every chance of putting all possible hurdles when something goes wrong with her from our side. It is also there that we also have the samething, but law is in favour of women, in our Indian society only women gets the support, not the men community. Women can ask for divorce in front of a judge, but a man cannot ask for divorce, he can only ask for justice to be done.
Before Marriage:
These things are done as a measure of precautionary measure/to be safe side, not compulsory that each and every aspect is met. But will be helpful when there is some problem. We take precautionary measures in offices like servicing the vehicle, cleaning up the system, the same way this one.
1. Do not go into detail every aspect of your personal life while discussing on phones or when you meet personally.
2. Don't take frantic calls/ make frantic calls pretend you are busy, tell softly will get back soon when time permits, go when you really have time to leisure. This need not be done every time when she makes a request. Sometimes exclaim her that we will go, within a short notice.
3. Don’t talk much from your side, just try to get as much information, pretend you are also giving that much information when asked but never complete information. Eat out the actual point in your discussion by bringing something more.
4. Enjoy outings to a limit, you are still unmarried.
5. Never ever stay with your about in-laws before and after marriage unless there is something which happened contrary to your plan and expectation or when helpless.
6. Don’t make frequent visits to your in-laws any time(I mean before and after marriage whenever the context of any time comes).
7. Don’t send frantic messages, namely you are the world; you are my only love ... any time.
8. If you have very affection keep it in yourselves don’t ever try to express even after marriage.
9. Try to record happy moments in front of her with her knowledge. Moments should be recorded whether it is a happy note or sad note.
10. Record all discussions in video possible when some financial matters aspect, that to in the presence of elders (relatives may or may not be considered but third party person is compulsory concerned who is near to you or who knows about your family and is concerned to your family - the person/person's in consideration).
11. There should be agreement that in case of any problem, either party should not try to disturb others by any means (this agreement details can be got from a lawyer, they have done good homework after many false cases) and paper evidences of what ever you have given and taken from them or given by you. Everything should be witnessed by the person discussed above.
12. Even for Sthridhan there should be evidence of what you have taken and what they have given. Everything should be witnessed by the person discussed above.
13. If you feel that you that you hurt feelings don’t go over, say sorry and tell it will not be repeated. Try not repeat again in your life. But never expect from the opposite side that she will do the same as you are trying to do.
14. If your attitude hurts her beyond your thinking, although you are right in your own way, better not to marry her.
After marriage
About Marriage:
A wife is the most concerned woman who looks after a husband at their house, keeping a watch that when he comes. She is the one who has left her parents in faith that you will look after her. Even though if she does no work if she is a house wife, she does all the household work, look after the house where on lives, domestic chores and many more cannot be looked single handedly with any other's help, Supreme court also gave ruling that she is doing work of Rs.3000/- and many other things which cannot be counted on her part. So, treat her on par with you reason she is equally respected however bigger you are, children of lesser age take blessings from both of us, this shows that she is equal to our level, even though she is younger to us, or earns less than us. This can be equally observed when we are at marriages, occasions, social meetings, functions, poojas...... So, take proper care from your side that all is well and nothing beyond.
1. Do not go into detail every aspect of your personal life while discussing on phones or when you meet personally, reveal some which you expect that it is not going to hit your privacy even if there is some misunderstanding.
2. Don't take frantic calls pretend you are really busy putting a sorry note in a soft manner, never cry foul, show your emotions, and never show official problems (keep your official problems with you and your friends every time) on her put a date for going when you are free, chart out a plan that you make some times and sometimes a miss due to co-incidence due to some other that you may not go for that but some other thing which expected not to happen.
3. Don’t talk much from your side, just try to get as much information, pretend you are always with her every time although you are thing some other thing. Don't talk much is the rule of marriage to keep away differences, unnecessary discussions, the much you talk much discussions will lead to some other thing contrary to what we expect.
4. Enjoy outings to a limit convenient to you, you are now married. Your bachelorhood has come to an end. You cannot be the same as previous lover of your wife as you have no reason for getting her away from you, this being in your mind; you will just take granted for what you have done earlier. But she is in no mood of what you are in; keeps thinking that you should be the same old man what she though before and like you to be like that. This can never be possible. But we can take out some time for leisure.
5. Never ever stay with your in-laws before and after marriage unless there is something which happened contrary to your plan and expectation or when you are helpless, unless it is a customary. Your stay will lesser your image that's what I say.
They have more personal look of you when you are at their place, can go more personal about your feelings, likings and want to get more closer than you have enjoyed (but I feel business entity, should be different from personal entity which is generally followed in accounting terms). The marriage which has happened is a busy entity. Marriage, although one form of business of living, it cannot be insured, I mean a loss of one's marriage cannot be insured. A loss of wife or husband can be insured. That is importance given for a marriage of two persons. By this you can expect how fragile a marriage is. This means that marriage cannot be trusted or one can have good faith in marriage.
6. Don’t make frequent visits to your in-laws any time. If you have no business there, take turn of your vehicle on road itself and come back to your place after dropping her or meet a friend if nearby if it happens that you may need to take her back after sometime. When picking up, you might go inside for some time, but do not stays there on one or more pretext even if your wife is not willing to come, after three or four times of such a measure she will automatically make her mind. If she doesn’t make her mind, there is some action needed from our side.
7. Send messages, prevent calls either side, otherwise trouble of getting all the calls (mostly unnecessary) creating disturbance to work and in front of boss, or anytime when we are in work or when we are not in a mood to take any calls after much exhaustion. But send proper messages at times when we are late, we have a meeting, we had to have a dinner but never say that you are your parents place if you happen to have parents in the same city and you had to go there with out her or against her wishes.
8. If you have very affection about her, keep it in yourselves don’t ever try to express it. But express it before people, your friends, parents, her parents but never before her.
9. Try to record happy moments soon after marriage, they cannot be returned again in your life time. The same will not be got back at any cost. Moments should be recorded whether it is a happy note or sad note.
10. If it happens that there are some disturbances that is going to happen or has happened, don’t get directly involved in it with your parents and her parents. Always bring the third person discussed the good Samaritan in our marriage from our side and discuss in front of him. All this should be video recorded. If the other party objects for some, don't come in line with them, ask them to come in their own way or give another camera to capture the events in their own way. But never resort to change in original any way by the new technology, it can go awry. We cannot underestimate the technology use by any one, although however unknowledgeable the government or the court may be of these.
10. All giving’s and taking should be recorded in a friendly manner, one video recorder and camera person from our family should always take that duty. This will make habituated without any objections from either side, because he keeps recording each and every aspect which is known to both the families. So, never ever forget to record all discussions in video when some financial matters aspect is concerned, that to in the presence of elders (relatives may or may not be considered but third party person is compulsory concerned who is near to you or who knows about your family and is concerned to your family
- the person/person's in consideration).
11. All will be well when all is flourishing well but when differences arise there will be none, if you take a single path.
Therefore, there should be a definite agreement if not taken already earlier, that in case of any problem, either party should not disturb others by any means (this agreement format and other details can be got from a lawyer, they have done good homework after many false cases) and paper evidences of what ever you have given and taken from them or given by you.
Everything should be witnessed by good Samaritan.
12. Even after that meeting, if you find no change, you have to think twice. You can sense by their actions that a doomsday will come. Pretend that you are not in mood of any change with what you are doing. This will irritate and finally one day she will leave. Try to keep talking always with her and her family members, relatives from the opposite side (all these days of marriage you might have met, keep in contact for future use, call them for parties, social meetings that happen in the family either side, be close to them, they are always better than our in-laws from whom you can get much details and also they are moreover like us). Don’t put details unless they themselves start about the current happenings.
13. Incase of problem: Don't stay at weekends mainly from Friday evening onwards, as Saturday and Sunday being holiday for courts to apply for bail, the complaint whenever it may be filed, they will come on Friday night to give trouble. If such a situation has come to go jail, go along with them without any protest. Before going for a decision when the trouble started, think whether you want to live your wife in future or not.
First Case: If you want to live because of several problems, family problems, monetary problems and what not go for jail do nothing; you or your people will get back on bail in 3 to 4 days in total. This will leave the whole family who met such jail not to take back the girl, but due to inherent fear they say you should live with her without any further trouble. Then you decide that you will be with her. Now try adjusting, if she comes in line its well and good. Otherwise, you can do what she has mentioned in the complaint to her and discharge her, closing the chapter of hers in your book. Now, you can do as you wish, if again jailed no problem, once jailed or repeated jails even 100 times won't matter, then you can decide your next course of action. Now you will be definitely free from your wife and own pestering by your family members and others.
Second Case: If you think you can never get along with her. Go to jail. You will get bail in 3 to 4 days. Before the police you say, whatever you do I am not interested any more in my wife. This word will make them think twice and the same thing should be put before the lawyer saying that "I don't want to live with the bitch that had put me in jail; the case file by her is a false case, which has caused severe mental cruelty to me and my family". On these words the opposite party will apply for divorce or come in terms with you and you are free.
One thing to note, if a vacation happens to be there near your problem, never stay at your place of living. Because all through the holidays of court you will be in jail for no fault of yours. Courts have vacations, like that of schools and colleges, all this has led to the current state of affairs where scores of cases are pending for years together in court.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have taken extract from a good site which is presented here.
What are the Ten Most Dangerous Mistakes men Probably Make with Women?
Here Are The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women...And How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common
Mistakes...
MISTAKE #1: Being Too Much Of A "Nice Guy"
Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted "nice" guys?
Of course you have.
Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.
What's going on here?
It's actually very simple...
Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT
LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.
And guess what?
Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION.
And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you.
I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT... but GET OVER IT.
Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.
MISTAKE #2: Trying To "Convince Her To Like You"
What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like... but she's just not interested?
Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.
Well, I have news for you... YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!
Never, ever, EVER.
You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning".
Think about it.
If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her?
But we all do it.
When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.
Bad idea. One that will never work.
MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her For Approval Or Permission
In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission".
Another HORRIBLE idea.
Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them... EVER.
Don't get me wrong here.
You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you.
But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again.
You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.
Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her...
MISTAKE #4: Trying To "Buy" Her Affection With Food And Gifts
How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone
who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did?
If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.
Well guess what?
It's only NATURAL when this happens...
That's right, I said NATURAL.
When you do these things, you send a clear message:
"I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".
Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation.
That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.
MISTAKE #5: Sharing "How You Feel" Too Early In The Relationship with Her
Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.
Attractive women are rare.
And they get a LOT of attention from men.
Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE TIME
An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translate into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.
And guess what?
Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men.
That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.
They know what to expect.
And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.
This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.
Don't do it. Lean back. Relax.
There's a much better way...
MISTAKE #6: Not "Getting" How Attraction Works For Women
Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION.
You need to accept this fact, and deal with it.
When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual-attraction.
But does the same apply for women?
Do women feel sexual-attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on?
Well, after studying this topic for over five full years now, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks.
Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?
Think about it.
Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL than they are to looks alone.
If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.
But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this.
And ANY guy can learn how...
MISTAKE #7: Thinking That It Takes Money And Looks
One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started... because they think that
attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age.
And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.
But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks.
There are personality traits that attract women like a magnet...
And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys.
YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.
Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.
MISTAKE #8: Giving Away All Of Your Power To Women
Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission.
Well, another similar tactic that a lot of guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women.
Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.
Another bad idea...
Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to Wussies!
MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing EXACTLY What To Do In Each Type Of Situation With Women
A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking.
Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES.
I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.
And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!
And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating...
Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything.
If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING.
And you KNOW it.
It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.
MISTAKE #10: Not Getting HELP
This is the biggest mistake of all.
This is the mistake that keeps most men from EVER having the kind of success with women that they truly want.
I know, guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help.

http://498a.org/forum/viewtopic.php?p=31862&sid=e4de73658e160eea856edd43a0344213#p31862

also read http://498a.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=3561

Men's forum demands national commission for them

Men's forum demands national commission for them

R. Ilangovan

‘Many women are abusing laws for nefarious gains'

 

Protect us:A poster on Section 498A of IPC that was displayed at the national

conference of All India Men's Welfare Association at Yercaud.

SALEM: A national-level coordination forum of men has called for protection from wives and live-in partners whom they charged with exploiting women's welfare legislation that arm them with ‘unbridled' power to act against men.

The men, who claim to be ‘victims' of such legislation from all over the country, spent three days in a resort at the hill station of Yercaud near here to deliberate on how to protect themselves and their kith and kin from harassment and to kick-start a campaign to impress upon policy-makers to think about their plight before enacting such lop-sided laws.

The forum said that many women were abusing these laws for nefarious gains by filing charges against their husbands and partners.

The provisions in these statutes, they called, were ‘anti-men' leading to suicide of nearly 60,000 men as against 32,000 women annually.

Between 2004 and 2008, seven lakh men and family members were arrested including 500 minors and 5000 aged people, they claimed.

They pointed out that, for instance, laws such as the Dowry Prohibition Act, Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, Sec 125 of Cr. PC and above all Section 498A of Indian Penal Code were too stringent and non-bailable.

Women's lobbies

“Though a debate is going on in legal circles on whether to amend or not especially Sec 498A to prevent its abuse, a few powerful women's lobbies are blocking it,” said Suresh Ram, National Collegium member, All India Men's Welfare Association, which organised the 3 {+r} {+d} Men's Rights Conference of the Delhi-based Save Indian Family Foundation at Yercaud in Salem district.

Delegates from Maharashtra, Assam, West Bengal, Uttar Pradesh, Karnataka, Andhra Pradesh, Chattisgarh, Madhya Pradesh and from the U.S. attended the deliberations.

A majority of them were from Karnataka, mainly young Information Technology professionals. They said that they would urge the government to replace the words ‘Husband and Wife' with ‘Person' in the said acts. They said that cases before Family Courts should be expedited and settled within two years.

The government would be approached to form National Commission for Men, they add.

http://www.hindu.com/2010/08/17/stories/2010081754400500.htm

Strategy and Tactics

Strategy and Tactics

by Welmer on October 6, 2009

Rather than writing only about how to advance men’s interests in a practical manner here, I’d like to dive into the rather abstract dialogue we see developing here around the issue of troubles facing the modern, Western man.

First, I’ll note that one thing that still surprises me is how often other writers such as Novaseeker and zed touch on exactly the same issues that have been going through my mind. What this says to me is that there is an objective problem out there, standing like a monolith, that is easily observed by disparate people throughout our land. It really is impossible to ignore at this point, and more and more people are beginning to put some thought into its solution.

However, first we have to start defining the nature of the problem and make an effort to understand what brought it about. Is it Feminism, Social Conservatism or chivalry? These are all problems, to be sure, but what it really comes down to is how they are used. Feminism is used to appeal to women on the basis of equality, Social Conservatism is used to convince men that they have to put up with incessant abuse to earn the right to be a man, and chivalry is used to justify everything from adultery to murder in the guise of “protecting” women.

So why would people use these things, and what kind of people would do so? Wouldn’t there have to be some sordid, malicious conspiracy created by some nefarious group of hidden powermongers to carry all of this out? Of course conspiracy is involved, but not just “a conspiracy,” rather, innumerable conspiracies. People like to discount conspiracy theories as the ravings of lunatics, but they are ignoring the fact that conspiracies are simply how people get things done. Conspiracies are not only carried out by shady men in suits in the halls of power, but also by couple of people working in billing at some small business in your hometown who want to, say, get a rival fired.

Many divorces are conspiracies. Wife gets together with friends and complains about husband, friends offer advice on family law and lawyers, wife secretly hires an attorney, and suddenly husband is served and has two weeks to respond. That’s a nasty little conspiracy, but it’s really at the lowest level. A step above it you have the divorce lawyers, who lobby to get changes made to family law that will be good for business. If you think about family law from a strictly business perspective, there are two ways to increase profits. The first is increasing volume, and the second increasing fees. Essentially, you can have something akin to a fast food restaurant or, on the other hand, an expensive restaurant with $200 bottles of wine. Maybe you can do both, but it’s kind of a hard act to juggle too many different cases at once, according to guys I’ve spoken with who practice family law. If you want to go the McDivorce route, you’ll want the law to make divorces easier to obtain and simpler to finalize so you can plow through them. If you want to do it the other way, you’ve got to raise the stakes by encouraging high alimony payouts and huge settlements. Thanks to tireless work on their own behalf, divorce lawyers have managed to make both options available, so divorce has truly been democratized and rendered quite profitable for those in the business.

Above divorce lawyers there are businessmen and politicians. The politicians can use feminism to shore up their support from women, Social Conservatism to shame men into voting against their own interests and chivalry to excuse unconstitutional laws like VAWA. Of course, there’s money and power – and apparently sex – in all that for them as well. More social programs for women allow for better patronage networks and stronger coalitions that give them an edge in reelections. They have focus groups, lobbyists and advisors who conspire with them to pass the necessary bills and attain the funds.

The businessmen, being all about the money, are constantly competing on the basis of profit. There are a number of ways to increase profit, chief among them being increasing sales and lowering costs. Now, imagine that you could knock down wages by a huge influx of labor (working women), and simultaneously increase sales by pumping up female consumerism. Any businessman who failed to take advantage of this would lose out to those that did. So of course businesses jumped on the feminist bandwagon and started hiring women and pitching as many products to as many women as possible. However, business has started to hit a brick wall, in part due to the very nature of their new workers and consumers. This appears to make business the weakest link in the national conspiracy.

As demonstrated above, plenty of people benefited from the social trends that have increasingly burdened men over the last several decades. So is it at all surprising that so many have struggled – both openly and behind the scenes – to implement this brave new world? If squeezing working and middle class men – a minority of some 25% of the population – meant more money, privilege and power for everyone else, someone was bound to take advantage of that at some point. Aggravating the situation is the fact that America doesn’t face any credible existential threats anymore, so there’s really no reason to appease the men who would defend her.

So viewed from a strictly objective perspective, our pain was their gain [This is one reason Social Conservatism has been such a thorn in our sides -- our pain was elevated by this mutant philosophy to some kind of Sacred Duty, despite all manner of treachery and abuse]. However, there always comes a point where things just start to break down. You work a horse too hard and he might get a stress injury that cripples him for life. You beat the living daylights out of a dog on a regular basis and he’ll start to bite. The same can be said for men who have too much weight on their backs. In fact, I am convinced that this economic stimulus is simply cover for the dimishing returns we are getting from heaping ever more on the backs of America’s men. It’s a stopgap that won’t work, because this country has become a money pit where investments get you little more than landfills brimming with discarded women’s shoes and last year’s cell phones.

All of this came about because this was a strategy pursued by a grand coalition. It may not have been articulated clearly by one source, or even coherently articulated anywhere, but it was in fact a success, and it has only recently started to fray a little bit around the edges. But it is starting to look a bit shabby – especially to men – and there are hints that it could unravel in earnest.

So far, men have responded to a strategic war waged against their interests with tactics. Game has emerged as possibly the most effective tactic of all, and has started to put the brakes on the complete subjugation of masculinity in the Anglosphere by serving as an effective tool for release as well as parrying the barrage of assaults on masculinity. In this sense Game is necessary, but it isn’t enough. There are other tactics, to be sure, but mostly they consist of dodging the frontal assault — avoiding marriage, strict contraceptive practices, and beating the quick retreat have become de rigueur for the quick-witted man with an eye to self-preservation. However, we are, for the most part, entirely lacking in strategy.

Men are still reeling from the body-blows inflicted by feminism, backed up by complicit politics and spirituality. On the one hand you have a Bill Clinton, Ted Kennedy or Joe Biden with perfectly coiffed gray hair, and on the other you have a Ted Haggard, Jimmy Swaggart or Jim Bakker who are cut from the same cloth. At this point it would be entirely reasonable to assume that the tactics of self-preservation and gratification are all that is left to the typical man.

However, there is one very important factor that has been ignored by pretty much everyone involved: the ultimate destruction of the male economic and political base will undermine America’s ability to project economic and military power across the world. A nation of emasculated, impoverished men that is run only by the likes of Oprah, Obama and Hillary Clinton is a true paper tiger. In time, it will become so weak that even the crushed men under its jurisdiction will have renewed power, if only because they have been entirely disenfranhcised and therefore have nothing left to lose. Whether they have the will to do anything about it is another issue, but the opportunity will definitely present itself.

The question this presents is what strategy men will begin to pursue. Will it be endless self-gratification, hedonism and dissipation until the entire edifice crumbles around us? Perhaps, but given what we’ve put up with so far it doesn’t seem as though that is a true expression of our nature. In fact, I’m pretty sure that many of us will rise to the occasion and redefine what our civilization means. It certainly won’t be a walk in the park to do so, but men crave challenges, and I think there are still enough of us up to it. And either way, imagine the spoils of victory. What man in his right mind would deny the fruits of a better society? Certainly neither alpha nor beta.

Fortunately, we have already done the hard work. Men have gone the extra mile, we have given up the shirts on our backs, and we have turned the other cheek. We have lost our wealth, our labor and our very pride. As bitter as the process may have been, we have gained something far grander than these ephemeral marks of stability and respectability: true freedom of will. We have finally rubbed the sand out of our eyes and started to see that many of the duties demanded of us are impossible (not to mention undesirable) to fulfill, and that there are other options.

This suggests a very simple and effective strategy: Spread The Word. As more and more men wake up to the fact that they have better choices, the old attitudes and coercive systems designed to keep us in our place will prove to be little more than a bump on the road rather than the invincible walls so many of us see them as today. In fact, more and more of us have begun to adopt this strategy, and this should be very encouraging; a revolution always starts with The Word.

Our goal – emancipation of men – is already clear, and the fog is beginning to lift and reveal the path toward that goal. All that remains is to put on our boots, strike camp, and get on our way.

Infosys HR Manager confesses to killing wife - Priyanka's hubby in jail

update

TNN, Aug 21, 2010, 07.46am IST
BANGALORE: After eight days in police custody, Infosys HR manager Sathish Kumar Gupta was remanded to judicial custody on Friday and sent to Parappana Agrahara jail.

He has been accused of murdering his wife Priyanka Gupta, a teacher with DPS South. Priyanka was found dead in her house at Hulimavu on August 10, with her throat slit. Sathish, who was arrested, confessed to the murder.
He said Priyanka repeatedly `harassed' him by imploring him to stay away from his parents, and threatening to lodge a dowry harassment case against him.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/bangalore/Priyankas-hubby-in-jail/articleshow/6383933.cms#ixzz0xEKhy9tM

Infosys HR Manager confesses to killing wife

Aug 14, 2010
Bangalore: A senior employee of Infosys Technologies Ltd has confessed to murdering his wife, a Delhi Public School teacher, on Tuesday, police said on Saturday.
Satish Kumar Gupta, a senior manager in the IT bellwether's human resource department, was arrested late on Friday. "He has admitted to murdering Priyanka after sustained questioning by us. There were discrepancies in his statements over the sequence of events and the details of the mobile calls he received and made," said a police officer investigating the case.
"Though Satish has said he eliminated her because she was not treating his parents well, we are probing the dowry angle also," the officer said.

He has been sent to police custody by a magistrate.
The couple, hailing from Lucknow and married for four years, had shifted to a rented house in Hulimavu in south Bangalore from his parent's house in the same locality about six months back, police said. They had no children.
Priyanka was found dead in her flat early on Tuesday, with her throat slit and hands and legs tied.
In a statement on the day of the murder Satish had told the police that when he went for a morning walk at around 5.40 am, his wife called him on his mobile to check if he had asked anyone to supply newspapers, as two unidentified people were standing at the door telling he had sent them to the house and to open the door.
"I told her that I did not send anyone and that she should not open the door but carry on with her yoga session. When I returned at 6.40 am, I found the door locked and there was no response to the door bell or her mobile. I thought she would have gone back to sleep. Then I went to office to bring the duplicate keys and was shocked to find her dead on entering the house," Satish, 32, said in a statement to police.
City Joint Police Commissioner (crime) Alok Kumar had said after visiting the second floor rented house of the couple, "We are not clear why Gupta didn't inform the police immediately or enquired from neighbours about the crime."
"How could the main door have remained locked and her throat slit? How and from where did the assailants enter the house?" Kumar said.
Satish had told the police that gold, jewellery and some other valuables worth Rs.2.5 lakh were missing from the house though a gold chain around Priyanka's neck and a gold ring on her finger were intact on her body.


http://ibnlive.in.com/news/infosys-hr-manager-arrested-for-wifes-murder/128817-3.html?from=tn

Men demand union ministry for their welfare, gender neutral laws, time-bound settlement of matrimonial cases and launch National Litigant Bench (NLB)

Men demand union ministry for their welfare, gender neutral laws, time-bound settlement of matrimonial cases and launch National Litigant Bench (NLB)

August 15th, 2010

Chennai, Aug 15 (IANS) Over 100 men’s rights activists who held two-day deliberations at Tamil Nadu’s Yercaud hill station have demanded a separate union ministry for men’s welfare and fast-track courts for deciding matrimonial cases.

The delegates at the conference also sought amendments to various laws to make them gender neutral and demanded time-bound settlement of matrimonial cases in courts.

Manoj David, an activist, told IANS: “The conference passed a resolution demanding the union government to form a separate ministry for men’s welfare.”

“The conference also passed a resolution demanding substitution of words husband/wife with spouse in all laws. We also want the words man or woman occurring in laws to be replaced with the word person,” he said.

According to him, the judiciary should decide all matrimonial cases within two years.

“In matrimonial cases, the youth and vitality of the disputing parties are also involved. Delaying such cases will affect their lives beyond repair. Hence, such cases have to be settled by courts in a time bound manner. Setting up of fast track courts to try matrimonial cases is our demand,” David said.

The conference also passed several other resolutions and saw the launch of the National Litigant Bench (NLB) to help litigants in knowing their rights so that they are protected from undue judicial delays.

Members belonging to around 22 NGOs from different parts of the country participated in the conference.

The members celebrated the country’s 64th Independence Day as sugarless, day drinking coffee and tea sans sugar.

The conference was organised by Bangalore-based Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF).

http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/uncategorized/men-demand-union-ministry-for-their-welfare_100412740.html

http://sify.com/news/men-demand-union-ministry-for-their-welfare-news-national-kipuacbbdbi.html

http://www.dailytimesindia.com/2010/08/151162.htm

http://www.vattal.com/news/men-demand-union-ministry-for-their-welfare/

http://www.google.co.in/search?q=Men+demand+union+ministry+for+their+welfare&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

For 'harassed' men, Independence Day will be sugarless - Sugarless Independence day - Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF) national conference at Yercaud – Demand mens welfare ministry gender neutral laws- 498a, PWDVA ( domestic violence act, sexual harassment at workplace bill and shared parenting and joint child custody

http://www.google.co.in/search?q=For+%27harassed%27+men%2C+Independence+Day+will+be+sugarless&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

For 'harassed' men, Independence Day will be sugarless

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/For-harassed-men-Independence-Day-will-be-sugarless/articleshow/6303403.cms#ixzz0wckcDvv8

http://www.deccanchronicle.com/national/harassed-men-independence-day-will-be-sugarless-460

IANS, Aug 13, 2010, 09.17am IST

 

CHANDIGARH/SHIMLA: A clutch of Indian men are preparing to mark a "sugarless" Independence Day this year as a symbol of the bitter life they have been handed out by women who harass them and even deny them parenting rights.

To show that even men get hounded in society, men's rights organisation Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF) is organising a 'Sugarless Independence Day' conference Aug 15 at Yercaud in Tamil Nadu, a hill station 32km from the steel town of Salem.

"Men's rights activists attending the conference have decided to have sugarless tea or coffee on August 15 this year and also not to have any other sweets. This is an epitome of the bitterness in the lives of men who are living in a society where there are only expectations from them," said Gaurav Saini, coordinator of SIFF's Chandigarh chapter.

SIFF, which started in Bangalore in 2005, now claims a membership of nearly 30,000 men in India and abroad. It positions itself as a men's rights organisation fighting against the misuse of dowry laws, domestic violence act and other laws perceived as anti-male.

"On Independence Day, when we meet we will abstain from taking sugary foodstuff," Virag Dhulia, a senior member of SIFF, said.
The Yercaud conference, the third of its kind, will have nearly 200 men's rights activists from all over India, representing about 15 different NGOs working for men's rights and participating to intensify the movement of men's rights in India.

Another Bangalore-based NGO, CRISP (Children's Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting), is among the participants.
"This is a unique way of lodging our protest towards woman-centric Indian Penal Code (IPC) clauses, which are totally unconstitutional," CRISP founder presidentKumar V Jahgirdar said.

But National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) records say there were 195,856 crimes against women in 2008, of which 81,344 cases were of cruelty by husbands and their relatives against married women.

"Men continue to dominate every sphere of society. In cases of crimes related to women, they are mostly the tormentors rather than the victims. Some men may have been harassed by women but their numbers would be minuscule compared to women victims," women rights activist Abhilasha Bali said.

But the conference will nevertheless highlight the plight of "harassed" men. "This men's rights conference is being conducted to discuss and intensify the awareness campaign on various problems being faced by men in India as sons, brothers, husbands and fathers, including skyrocketing suicide rates by men, especially married men," SIFF coordinator Mandeep Puri said.

Puri pointed out that as per the NCRB, nearly 58,000 married men are committing suicide every year compared to only about 30,000 married women.

"From 1996 to 2008, 170,000 married men have committed suicide directly due to domestic violence," he added.
SIFF activists are upset that there is no concern in India about the plight of men.

"Not a single rupee has been allocated for men's welfare in the union budget in the last 63 years of independence even though men pay 82 percent of the taxes. Not a single study has been conducted by the government to study men's issues. Men do not even have a welfare ministry of their own whereas animals have," Puri pointed out.

Gaurav Saini said: "As per the NCRB, from 2004 to 2008, 550,000 men have been arrested without trial or investigation under Section 498-A, merely on the basis of a complaint from their wives.

"The mothers and sisters of men face hostile situations too. As per the NCRB, from 2004 to 2008, 160,000 innocent mothers and sisters of husbands were arrested without trial or investigation under Section 498-A, merely on the basis of a complaint from the wives of their brothers and sons."

SIFF activists say men are often treated as 'unpaid bodyguards' and 'free ATM machines' for the family.

"This time again we will discuss ways to impress upon the central government regarding the setting up of a men and child welfare ministry on the pattern of the women and child welfare ministry," said Jahgirdar, who is fighting for the shared parenting of his 10-year-old daughter with his ex-wife.

CRISP, with its 2,500 members, is also demanding shared parenting and joint custody as a rule in separation and divorce cases.
Delhi-based child counsellorEkta Singh said: "These days both the parents are working and they are playing an equal role in bringing up the child. For a child, both the parents are equally important and isolation of one of them in most cases leads to mental distress and trauma in the child."

She said the courts should also be more flexible on shared parenting like allowing the children to stay with their father on vacations or weekends.

Read more: For 'harassed' men, Independence Day will be sugarless - India - The Times of India http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/For-harassed-men-Independence-Day-will-be-sugarless/articleshow/6303403.cms#ixzz0wck7JbNO

 

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I-Day ‘no sugar day’ for hubbies

 

Posted On Friday, August 13, 2010 at 05:13:39 AM

http://www.bangaloremirror.com/article/10/201008132010081305133965923e46f13/IDay-%E2%80%98no-sugar-day%E2%80%99-for-hubbies.html

Hemanth.Kashyap@timesgroup.com

Come August 15, harassed husbands from various parts of the country will meet and devise ways to get freedom from their wives. The day will also be observed as a ‘Sugarless Day’ in which they will abstain from sweets.

As the nation celebrates its 64th year of Independence from British rule, more than 500 harassed husbands will meet at Yercaud, a hill station near Salem (Tamil Nadu), and chalk out strategies to legally fight their former wives and in-laws.
While it is common to distribute sweets on the occasion of Independence Day, these husbands will boycott sweets. Reason: they haven’t got freedom from their wives.

BITTER LIFE
These husbands, who represent CRISP (Children’s Rights Initiative for Shared Parenting) Bangalore  and SIFF (Save Indian Family Foundation), besides some NGOs, will have sugarless coffee and tea, and avoid sweets - an expression of “bitterness in our lives”.
“Unfortunately, we live in a society where there are only expectations from us and no acceptance,” said Kumar Jahgirdar, President, CRISP.
“We want custody of the child and want divorce cases settled at the earliest. The more the delay, more the harassment by our wives and the police,” said Panduranga Katti, president, SIFF.
More than 1,000 cases are awaiting speedy disposal in various family courts across the country. “We’ll work out strategies to put an end to our plight,” said Katti.

Third conclave

The first such conference was held in Goa in 2008 and the second in Shimla, in 2009. This is the third meet. Maharashtra’s Purush Suraksha Sanstha and Uttar Pradesh’s Pathi Paramesh Kendra will also take part in the event. The husbands contend they are trapped in a ‘women-centric society’ and will not celebrate I-Day until their demands are met.

‘MEN’S WELFARE’ MINISTRY

Their demands include creation of a separate ministry for men’s welfare on the lines of women and child welfare ministry, equal taxation for men and women, change in inheritance laws, amendment to Domestic Violation Act of 2005 and mandatory joint custody of children for divorced couples.
A SIFF member said the suicide rate among husbands is twice that among women. “More than 1.2 lakh harassed husbands have committed suicide in the past five years. We are committed to fighting such wives through these forums,” he said.

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Taking care of mother, children statutory duty of MCD: HC

Taking care of mother, children statutory duty of MCD: HC

PTI

New Delhi, Aug 11 (PTI) The MCD has a statutory duty to see that women and children are properly looked after, the Delhi High Court said and dismissed a PIL seeking a direction to the civic agency not to build a Maternity and Child Welfare Home to prevent "wastage" of public money.

"Taking care of the child is national duty. No one should forget that the child is the father of man.It is the duty of MCD to see that women and children are properly looked after.It is the women who nourish and foster the children who eventually build the nation," said a Division Bench of Chief Justice Dipak Misra and Justice Manmohan. "We really fail to fathom when a centre for maternity home and child welfare is established to serve the cause of the women and children who really need help and assistance, how can the same amount to wastage of public exchequer," the Bench said and dismissed the PIL.

The Delhi Anusuchit Jati Vikas Sangathan, a registered society, through a PIL sought a direction prohibiting MCD from spending Rs 2.50 crore and a land measuring 1000 square metre in B Block, JJ colony-II in Nangloi area as the same land was earmarked for construction of a school.

"When an effort has been made to take care of mothers, it is unfathomable how someone can come up and make such a grievance," the Bench said.

CHILD CUSTODY LAWS-Fathers denied child custody-demand SHARED PARENTING - p7 news

PART 1/2 - CHILD CUSTODY LAWS-Fathers denied child custody-demand SHARED PARENTING - p7 news 8aug10

 

 

 

 

PART 2/2 - CHILD CUSTODY LAWS-Fathers denied child custody-demand SHARED PARENTING - p7 news 8aug10

 

Dis- Honour killings - the perpetrators of the crimes were from the girl’s family says National Commission for Women (NCW), Ministry of Women and Child Development

It is all the more necessary that a new section of IPC 304C be made and girl and her family be arrested for every death of any HUSBAND within 7 years of marriage

section 304C IPC

Where the death of a MAN is caused by any burns or bodily injury or occurs otherwise than under normal circumstances within seven years of his marriage and it is shown that soon before his death he was subjected to cruelty or harassment by his wife or any relative of his wife for, or in connection with, any demand for money or property , such death shall be called "honour killing" and such wife or relative shall be deemed to have caused his death.

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Dis-Honour killings - the perpetrators of the crimes were from the girl’s family says National Commission for Women (NCW),Ministry of Women and Child Development

The study commissioned by the National Commission for Women (NCW). and carried out by NGO Shakti Vahini was confined to the States of Haryana, Punjab and Western Uttar Pradesh. However, 560 cases profiled by the NGO reflects that it is a north Indian phenomenon.
The study reveals that in 88.93% of the total 560 cases surveyed, the perpetrators of the crimes were from the girl’s family.
The Study Report has inter-alia highlighted the following:-

 
• Honour Killings have been reported most from those areas where the Khap Panchayats are active.
• Shakti Vahini studied 560 cases where couples have been threatened. Of these 560 cases, 121 persons have been killed.
• Honour Killings are less about gotra issue and more about inter caste marriages.
• Violence and threatening of couples has been reported both from rural and urban areas and from almost all sections of the society.
• The reaction to the inter-caste marriages are much stronger and violent when the girl marries a dalit or to a lower caste than her own.
• The skewed sex ratio in the area has led to the worsening of the status of women in this region.

This information was given by Smt. Krishna Tirath, Minister of State for Women and Child Development in a written reply to a question in the Rajya Sabha today.

http://pib.nic.in/release/release.asp?relid=64385